hackthis_archive | War, Southland and comment-fic, oh my!

It's interesting that the plague showing up in China and the Birthers bullshit only kind of makes me nervous, but

tomricks interrupting his vacation to blog about shit falling apart in Iraq makes me want to crawl under my desk and kiss my ass goodbye.

Also, this article about a personal trainer who put on 88 lbs. just so he could lose it and see what it's like for his clients is pretty compelling. I think this is going to make him a much stronger trainer.

I feel like I'm saying this every time I post (and I probably am, too bad!), BUT, for those stragglers who aren't on the train yet. NBC is re-airing Southland right now in the run up to the premiere (Sept 25th) on Friday nights at 8pm. You can also watch it on NBC.com and on Hulu. They have the first four episodes up (there are only seven), so please, please please, watch it. You won't regret it. Really.

In other Southland news: Michael and Ben start filming tomorrow. If I was any more excited I'd bounce out of my chair. Oh, wait, and L is writing me comment!porn featuring slutty!Ben. You all wish you had an L, but she is mine. Okay, jointly shared with Q and A. And her family. And all of you, but you know what I mean.

Offer Redux!: Oh, and I've been thinking, you know, I had so much fun the last time around that if anybody's got some like photos or something and might want some comment-fic, you know, I think I'm open for business.* Who knows, you might even get L, A and Q to play along too. Then again, they might all boycott and you'll be stuck with me. ;-)

*You know how it goes.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Bitch, I will cut you. Write NOW.

"Is this the moment when I tell you that I lost the keys," Walt asks. He's grinning. Normally, Ray is estatic when Walt is this happy. It usually takes hours of effort on Ray's part. The last time he saw Walt with such a big grin was when Ray had done sock puppet theater for him with a Brad sock and a Nate sock. Walt had been especially impressed with how the Brad sock's eyes seemed to follow you where ever you went. The point being that Ray loves making Walt happy, but even Ray has his limits.

"I think that's supposed to be my line," Ray replies because really if anyone was the handcuffer in this relationship as opposed to the handcuffee, it was Ray.

Walt looks hurt. "You were planning on handcuffing me naked to the bed and then losing the keys? That's not very nice."

Ray glares. Some people thought Walt didn't have a sense of humor. The truth was that Walt's humor was just too twisted for even a Marine. There was fucked up. And then there was Walt. Everyone thought he was such a nice boy, too.

"Take off the handcuffs, Walt," Ray orders.

Walt smiles. "No."

It would be one thing if Walt was using this as opportunity to do incredibly perverted things to Ray while Ray was all helplesss. Ray would be a little cranky about the handcuffs then, but a tongue up his ass and a really nice orgasm would make Ray inclined to forgive Walt.

Walt, however, was just standing there watching him and it was making Ray nervous.

"Do you not understand how this game works?" Ray asks. "You tie me up. I'm all helpless. You shove your dick in my mouth and come all over my face and then blow me. Or there are really any number of options that I would be happy to go into more detail about. The point being that we should be having happy fun kinky sex times now. You're not just supposed to be standing there like a retard with your thumb up your ass. Actually, feel free to put a thumb in your ass. At least I'd have something interesting to watch if I'm stuck here."

"Do you not understand how this game works?" Ray asks. "You tie me up. I'm all helpless. You shove your dick in my mouth and come all over my face and then blow me. Or there are really any number of options that I would be happy to go into more detail about. The point being that we should be having happy fun kinky sex times now. You're not just supposed to be standing there like a retard with your thumb up your ass. Actually, feel free to put a thumb in your ass. At least I'd have something interesting to watch if I'm stuck here."

COMEDY GOLD! It's like Walt didn't get the memo about his TPS Report.

"I could gag you too," Walt threatens.

Ray pouts.

"I'll use the Brad sock puppet," Walt add. "I still have it."

"That's fucking sick!" Ray says. He's kind of impressed, though. He decides be quiet might be a good idea.

He lasts for about three seconds.

"Help! Help! I've been handcuffed to my bed by a man who doesn't know what to do with his dick!"

Walt laughs and Ray counts it as a minor victory.

"You have better fucking do something soon or I am taking away your pervert card," Ray says.

"There is no such thing as a pervert card."

"Walt, fuck me now. This is me begging. See what you have reduced me to?"

"Begging usually involves more pleading and less angry shouting, Ray."

"So you're just going to stand there and watch me?" Ray asks.

"You never stay still," Walt says. "I just wanted you to stay still for a little bit."

Ray thinks maybe this is when they're supposed to be having some sort of a moment. And Ray is all about moments. He would fucking hug the shit out of Walt if he could actually use his arms and get off the bed.

"Also," Walt adds, "Brad said he would give me 20 bucks if I'd do it and post the pictures to the internet."

"Walt," Ray says. "You do realize that when I get free from here, you are never going to be able to go to sleep ever again because the second that you do, I'm going to tie you to the bed, spank you, and then fuck you so hard the handcuffs won't even matter because you won't be able to move for days."

"Really?" Walt asks, finally taking a step closer.

"You really are a sick fuck," Ray says.

"Thank you," Walt says and then takes another step.

Ray's legs are not tied down and Walt is almost within range. Ray tries to look innocent. It's not something he's very good at.

"You don't think I know what's going to happen if I take another step?" Walt asks.

"Sex. A whole lot of dirty of sex. And then you'll make be pancakes," Ray says.

"I am not making you pancakes," Walt says, but he takes a step forward anways and Ray kicks out and knocks Walt onto the bed.

Walt lands with his head in Ray's lap. Ray is awesome.

"So..." Walt says. "Nap time now?"

"When I tied you up and fuck you, I'm not going to let you come," Ray threatens.

Walt mouths at Ray's cock and then looks up at him. "Tell me more."

"I think," Rays says as Walt bites at his hip. "I might love you. A lot."

Walt grins in delight and licks Ray's stomach as Ray plots out his future revenge.

"Help! Help! I've been handcuffed to my bed by a man who doesn't know what to do with his dick!".

And this is what you call the cops for. Ben and John would LOVE this call.

Ilu so hard. I even wrote more Southland and some Gs-verse. I will ponder Nate and Assassin!Brad when I get home.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalt! ♥ How are they so fucked up yet completely precious at the same time??? LOVE!

They are so insanely awesome. I may love them (and you) more than cheese. And I fucking *love* cheese, dude.

Heeeee :D Comedy gold, hotness and a moment = awesome!

Some people thought Walt didn't have a sense of humor. The truth was that Walt's humor was just too twisted for even a Marine. There was fucked up. And then there was Walt. Everyone thought he was such a nice boy, too.

I do! I think he's such a nice boy! Apparently I am very wrong about this.

"I am not making you pancakes," Walt says, but he takes a step forward anways and Ray kicks out and knocks Walt onto the bed.

Walt lands with his head in Ray's lap. Ray is awesome.

::dies laughing::

So awesome. Ilu.

War, Southland and comment-fic, oh my!

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Dude, I am cutting you off from the sugar - PART 1

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Part II

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