hackthis_archive ([personal profile] hackthis_archive) wrote2009-07-30 03:07 pm
Entry tags:

Generation Kill - The Messenger (Rated PG, Warning for Character Death)

I want to make it very clear upfront that this is not my fault. You can blame [livejournal.com profile] alethialia and [livejournal.com profile] romanticalgirl. There was some question about whether or not I could angst with the best of them. As someone who used to kill people for sport (Harry Potter people know exactly what I'm talking about) I take great offense to this.

So. This is a writing exercise to see how badly this could possibly this hurt. I had to get it done. I never said I wasn't a little sadistic (masochistic).

Generation Kill
Rated PG
Warning: Character Death
The Messenger






Brad's working on the specs for one of his client's when there's scrabbling at the lock on the front door. The door swings open a little violently, ricocheting off the wall.

That must've been one hell of a meeting.

Brad scratches at his temple, pulls his glasses off and sets them next to the notes he's scribbled down on how Initech's entire firewall could be hacked by a chimpanzee on Jolly Ranchers.

It's not Nate that's on the doorstep though.

"You know you don't live here," Brad says to Ray. "What did I tell you about stealing the spare key?"

Ray's laugh is weak. "Then you shouldn't leave it where anybody can find it, asshole."

"Burglary isn't a real concern in my house," Brad says wryly, waiting for Ray to come inside.

Ray keeps loitering on the doorstep though, and behind him, Brad can see the Henderson girls on their pink bikes, streamers flying as they sail past.

Brad glances at the corner of his laptop screen: it's 4:56 p.m. on a Tuesday afternoon.

He watches Ray shift from foot-to-foot the way he does when Walt's locked him out because Ray pissed him off again and Ray doesn't want to climb the drainpipe to get back into their apartment.

The corner of Brad's mouth quirks up at the left corner. "The homeless shelter is around the corner, Person. You might want to get there before Nate gets home. He's still pissed about the Super Glue on the toilet lid."

Ray blinks. "Yeah. I -- Brad."

Brad narrows his eyes. Something's -- something's very wrong.

He stands up fast enough that his chair tips over behind him. "What?"

"There -- there was this accident," Ray says, hands flying around as he talks. "A car accident."

Brad's across the room in seconds, invading Ray's air space like Napalm. "You had an accident in Hasser's car?" he says in disbelief. "You know Walt's going to --"

"BRAD!"

Brad's words die off like they just got hit by the 50 cal. Ray's eyes are too big, his face too pale. Even for his whiskey tango ass. He's not looking at Brad as much as he's looking over his right shoulder.

Brad waits for it. Waits more. Recon Marines can wait forever if they have to.

He should just wait this one out. "Say it, Ray," he grits out anyway.

Ray swallows and looks away. And that's when Brad starts to lose the feeling in his toes.

Ray always looks him in the eye, bitching the entire time when he does about how Brad's fucking Hebrew ancestors were probably fucking giraffes in their downtime.

"Ray."

He doesn't know what's in his voice, couldn't define the tone with a thesaurus. He can hear the break though. He can feel it in his throat.

Ray swallows again; Brad can see his hands balling into fists. And then there are those eyes. The last time Brad saw Ray with this much despair he was detoxing from six weeks on Ripped Fuel.

"It's Nate," Ray says bluntly.

Brad blinks.

And then he blinks some more. He thought Ray was going to say Walt. He thought...

"Nate what?" he says roughly, his hands curling in on themselves. Ray's eyes are shining. Brad can't believe he didn't notice the redness before. "Say it!" he barks out.

For the first time since he showed up, Ray looks him in the eye. "Nate's gone, Brad. There was a pile up on the 5. Some big-rig tractor turned over..."

Brad cocks his head to the side as Ray's words die off. Brad can feel the pull in the tendons in his neck. His fingertips feel numb. "Someone would've called me," he says evenly.

"He was -- he was talking to Walt when it happened," Ray blurts out. "They -- there was supposed to be a surprise party for your birthday, and --

Brad is not going to apologize for punching Ray in the mouth.

He's not.

The messenger is the one that always gets it the worst, anybody who says otherwise is a liar.

So, Brad's just going to ignore these lies. Instead, he's going to go sit back down at his desk and go back to work. He's going to finish this assessment for that job he promised Nate he would finish. And then he's going to go turn the oven on so it'll get hot for the fish he's been marinating for dinner tonight.

In an hour or so, Nate'll get home from that pointless fucking fire drill that he got called back to L.A. for. Brad'll tell him about this sick fucking joke that Person pulled, and Nate'll ask why the hell Brad and Ray are friends at all.

They have this conversation at least every six months, sometimes more, sometimes less.

But in the meantime, Brad's just going to sit down here on the doorstep and wait.

Because that's what he and Nate do: they wait for each other.

They wait for the war to be over. They wait for Brad to come back from the UK. They wait for fucking DADT to be repealed so they can finally live together in this house that still has boxes in the garage.

So, Brad will sit here and wait for Nate to come home, because that's what Nate would want.



-end-

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 06:27 am (UTC)(link)
It's okay. I assure you the other 99% of what I write and what everybody else writes it not like this. It was a fluke. [livejournal.com profile] romanticalgirl is kind of brutal sometimes, but she gives really awesome happy endings.

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 06:31 am (UTC)(link)
And that was absolutely lovely and never do it again.

Have no plans to, but I had to. Also, holy shit, Wyatt and Jon are slow dancing on TDS! Ahem. Um. So... what was I saying? Oh, yeah, I had to do this, it was starting to fester. If I kept going this would've been like a fucking walk in the park compared to what I *would've* done. The opening scenes with them together, happy arguing over something tiny like who got to hold the remote control, the gorgeous sex, the little domestic things where Brad couldn't keep his hands to himself, how proud Brad is of Nate, and THEN I could've dropped this at the end and the land would be strewn with bodies. No, I'm only kind of thinking of -- okay, no, won't do it. We'll just leave it here.

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 06:34 am (UTC)(link)
I thought you were going to kill Ray! Seriously, I saw the character listing, and was like, 'okay, well, I can't really deal either way, but - bye bye, Ray. It was grand.'

The red herring is awesome tonight, isn't it? I was telling Q that everybody should be happy that this didn't have to chance to simmer for very long in my head (I laid out how I could've thrown it down and then the landscape would be strewn with sobbing people and boxes of Kleenex. Not that I aim for that sort of reaction these days. No. No. *looks shifty*)

[identity profile] dragondie.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 06:46 am (UTC)(link)
Oh God! Why would you do that? Why would the Universe do that?
:goes off to cry a million tears:

[identity profile] clare328.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 07:45 am (UTC)(link)
god, when i saw this my gut reaction was 'don't fucking touch it" but my brain was like "but it's annnnggst and you're an angst junkie and you know you want to" and like an idiot i listened to the little devil and now I'm traumatised. But my brain is still being triumphant because i actually think my sick mind enjoyed being traumatised by you killing my LT.

God, I'm feeling a bit fucked up right now. Stupid masochistic tendencies.
lazulus: (Jeeves is not amused)

[personal profile] lazulus 2009-07-31 08:01 am (UTC)(link)
You know, I can think of other ways for you to express your power and control issues that doesn't involve death fic. Just sayin'.
lazulus: (Geeks)

[personal profile] lazulus 2009-07-31 08:02 am (UTC)(link)
Don't worry, babe, I've got your back.

[identity profile] tikiaceae.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 08:17 am (UTC)(link)
God. I need to read something happy NOW. Or eat something totally unhealthy.

Oh, Brad...

[identity profile] demiana-kassio.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 08:30 am (UTC)(link)
Okay. This hurts a whole fucking lot. And really, it's too early in the day for me to be crying, so I just won't.

And I hope, now that you got it out of your system, this won't be a regular occurence. Seriously.

I really shouldn't start tearing up about fictional characters, this is just not beneficial to my health.

In summary: Don't do that again! Please.

[identity profile] sousha.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 09:27 am (UTC)(link)
So much love for you right now.

[identity profile] sousha.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 09:28 am (UTC)(link)
That is great. Really! And the end almost made me cry.

[identity profile] aboutademongirl.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 10:15 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, my. Oh, my. You appear to be both sadistic and masochistic, but this, despite the fact that it actually is the cause of the four tears completely ruining my mascara, is absolutely gorgeous. Really. *sniffles*

[identity profile] aboutademongirl.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 10:31 am (UTC)(link)
And damn it. I just went and read a bunch of happy things, but this is still haunting me.

[identity profile] iwwfw.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 12:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Okay, okay, you've proven your big angsty guns! Continue the Brad-voice perfection. Make the sad go away. I keep having to stop typing to wipe away the tears. My laptop does not like.
ext_236295: (Ray)

[identity profile] maurheti.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 01:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Badwrong!! Crying now. Beautiful, though...

[identity profile] romanticalgirl.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 02:01 pm (UTC)(link)
It may be that Ray was deliberately providing tequila to Walt in the hopes of such a thing actually occurring. Maybe. A little.

Also, next has to be the Walt and Ray in Vegas thing. I'll see if I can't work on that a little today. :)

[identity profile] romanticalgirl.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 02:03 pm (UTC)(link)
All is forgiven, right? We can go about happily porning now!

::waits for Ben details::

[identity profile] romanticalgirl.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 02:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Awww. Yay! I'm glad you liked it!
ext_1101: (GK - nate2)

[identity profile] lunasky.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 02:06 pm (UTC)(link)
That was just heartbreaking. It was this line:

Because that's what he and Nate do: they wait for each other.

That's the line that just killed me.

But I have to say, I kinda like a nice, angsty, horrible (only in a heart-twisting kind of way) deathfic every now and then. Yes, I'm probably sick and twisted, but it's refreshing in a way. Happy endings are by far my preference but the world seem that much happier some times if there's some chance of it not working out as well.

[identity profile] shoshannagold.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 03:48 pm (UTC)(link)
No, I'm only kind of thinking of -- okay, no, won't do it. We'll just leave it here. Is that an oath sworn in blood and kool-aid?

[identity profile] sparky77.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 03:54 pm (UTC)(link)
I cannot even begin to tell you how much glee the idea of Ray and Walt getting married in Vegas gives me.

[identity profile] sparky77.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 04:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Wyatt and Jon are slow dancing on TDS
WHAT!!! *runs off to find last night's TDS.

okay, no, won't do it.
Yes. I like the not doing it plan.

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 04:01 pm (UTC)(link)
You know, I can think of other ways for you to express your power and control issues that doesn't involve death fic. Just sayin'.

Really? Do tell.

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 04:03 pm (UTC)(link)
I hear you, sister.

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2009-07-31 04:04 pm (UTC)(link)
There you go, be optimistic. Optimism never hurt anybody. Except that one time.

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