Olympics r srs bzness.

[hackthis_archive]

It's not really possible to explain exactly how whipped I have been by the Olympics, but I will try:

a) Yesterday, I wrote French swimmer slash, because well, hotass.

b) While discussing said hotass, oconel produced this picture of Amaury Leveaux to which my entire thought was Wow. The French are more than welcome to talk smack when they look like this. And also? Someone needs to lick his back during sex. And if it can't be me, then he needs a man so I can write about this. Find him a man and I will write this story. Alain Bernard is 6'5. Just a thought.

c) NBC is playing along. Identify the male swimmer by his stomach. I shit you not.

c) In the morning I watch Jon and Stephen, it has pretty much always been this way. This week I have been channel surfing away from Jon and Stephen with alarming regularity because OMG! What if I miss swimming hotass? This aberration cannot be understated.

d) Last night, during the men's heats, the NBC commentators said, "[Their] coaches say that Ryan Lochte is the best thing to ever happen to Michael Phelps." And then they went on to talk about how Ryan helps Michael be more relaxed and I was like yeah, that's a sex shoutie right there.

In fact, this made my gaydar ping so hard I was momentarily deaf, but I said, No! I have written my Olympics slash. And then sparky77 sent me The World According to Lochte which has bling grills! Skateboarding! Drawing rain falling upwards! Dressing like John Travolta! and I realized I can not fight this.

Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte are totally having sex. And getting stoned. Probably in that order too.

ETA: And because nobody is more awesome than rowers: let's spread the homoeroticism around, hey?

ETA #2: I think Keith Olbermann said it best, "There are only two times of day: when Michael Phelps is preparing to race, and when Michael Phelps is racing."

Comments

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Which is adorable. And also puts pictures in my mind of Ryan nuzzling Michael's neck from behind to make him take them off.

Is it hot in here? I feel like it's hot in here. Or maybe it should be hot in here. Oh. Em. Gee. Do you think Michael's dick is getting chaffed with all these commentators riding it the way they are? Okay, yeah, that line is TOTALLY going in the story.

[thexpuzzler.livejournal.com]

*grins* I think those boys need to think really hard of arctic temperatures and cold showers at times, what with constantly being subjected to hard-core pretty and great assets ;)
I wonder, though. It would be kind of embarrassing to get a hard-on right before a swim, wouldn't it? *snorts* Has that ever happened before?
Anyway, haha, I find it deadly amusing how the most 'innocent' commentator statements can be turned into serious slashy content. Yay for having dirty minds.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

It would be kind of embarrassing to get a hard-on right before a swim, wouldn't it? *snorts* Has that ever happened before?

Oh, I have no doubt that it's happened before and probably after, but I'm sure that cold water will take care of that in a heartbeat.

[thexpuzzler.livejournal.com]

Or, you know. Other things/people/events will take care of it.
God, the porn, it's burning my mind.
Damn you and your gorgeous swim-porn sex fic thingie writing. Gah.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

I do not write this, they write this. I just transcribe for the masses ;-) Embrace the porn.

[thexpuzzler.livejournal.com]

Riiiiiight. Heeeh. "The victim killed himself, I just shot the gun."
But dude. Call it whatever you want, as long as I get some actual porn to embrace. *snugs* Lovely, lovely writer.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

I am pondering the Michael/Ryan, no doubt.