hackthis_archive ([personal profile] hackthis_archive) wrote2008-08-14 10:42 am

Olympics r srs bzness.

It's not really possible to explain exactly how whipped I have been by the Olympics, but I will try:

a) Yesterday, I wrote French swimmer slash, because well, hotass.

b) While discussing said hotass, [livejournal.com profile] oconel produced this picture of Amaury Leveaux to which my entire thought was Wow. The French are more than welcome to talk smack when they look like this. And also? Someone needs to lick his back during sex. And if it can't be me, then he needs a man so I can write about this. Find him a man and I will write this story. Alain Bernard is 6'5. Just a thought.

c) NBC is playing along. Identify the male swimmer by his stomach. I shit you not.

c) In the morning I watch Jon and Stephen, it has pretty much always been this way. This week I have been channel surfing away from Jon and Stephen with alarming regularity because OMG! What if I miss swimming hotass? This aberration cannot be understated.

d) Last night, during the men's heats, the NBC commentators said, "[Their] coaches say that Ryan Lochte is the best thing to ever happen to Michael Phelps." And then they went on to talk about how Ryan helps Michael be more relaxed and I was like yeah, that's a sex shoutie right there.

In fact, this made my gaydar ping so hard I was momentarily deaf, but I said, No! I have written my Olympics slash. And then [livejournal.com profile] sparky77 sent me The World According to Lochte which has bling grills! Skateboarding! Drawing rain falling upwards! Dressing like John Travolta! and I realized I can not fight this.

Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte are totally having sex. And getting stoned. Probably in that order too.

ETA: And because nobody is more awesome than rowers: let's spread the homoeroticism around, hey?

ETA #2: I think Keith Olbermann said it best, "There are only two times of day: when Michael Phelps is preparing to race, and when Michael Phelps is racing."

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2008-08-14 07:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Are they trying to make him more approachable... but in order to what? That's what eludes me a little, right now.


Marketing. Sponsorship. Money. It's always about money.

[identity profile] thexpuzzler.livejournal.com 2008-08-14 07:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, yes, I thought about advertising and such, but for that, wouldn't it be enough that he's the best swimmer of the whole human history and the likes? That's pretty impressive already. It's always been a bit of a mystery to me that people fall for the "that guy/girl's approachable" angle, because they're really not, not in the sense your next-door neightbour is, and no amount of friendship and humanizing and getting to know him will change that.

But I've never quite gotten ads and sponsoring in the first place, so maybe it's just as well that I don't get this angle either.
Sorry for spamming your journal!

[identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com 2008-08-14 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, not advertising for *him* but for all those companies that are going to want to make money off his name. Michael Phelps is the awesome Olympian, yes, but is he relatable? Marketing is always about relatability. Will you sell more of your item if everything thinks he uses it or if everybody thinks only he can use it? Everyman versus eliteism. That's where they try to market that 'boy next door' appeal, which you know, if the guy next door was like that, I'd lock myself out on a regular basis.
Edited 2008-08-14 19:30 (UTC)

[identity profile] thexpuzzler.livejournal.com 2008-08-14 07:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks for the explanation! :)

Heeeeh, you might want to unpack those cooking skills and bring over muffins on a regular basis, too. Preferably in a a towel and nothing else. Whoever knows. Could get lucky *g*