hackthis_archive | Desperate times and all that.

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Desperate times and all that.

I have no words to describe my boredom right now. I have no words to describe anything. I'm at the stalemate, and I'm tempted to do that Give me a prompt and I'll write you a two-line story for it.

Yeah, alright, hit me. First fifteen in the door get the prize.* Anything I've already written before is game, no Hermione. Look, I'll even show you how it goes. Example: Request: SGA, Sheppard/McKay (which, um, you could request too even though I don't watch the show)

"So, McKay, what's all this UST business?" Sheppard did that thing he did with his mouth when he was trying to play smart. Rodney wasn’t fooled. "Is it a new strand of the ATA gene?"

"It stands for Unresolved Sexual Tension, Major."

"Lieutenant Colonel."

"Please," Rodney scoffed. "With all this tension I could call you Susan, and you wouldn't care."

"What tension?"

"The sexual tension between us."

"What sexual tension between us?"

"See, that's why it's unresolved! Because you can't admit it's there!"*

*If you're late, you might be able to bribe me with music. I'm partial to Eric B and Rakim, Tom Jones, New Edition, Doug E Fresh and the Get Fresh Crew.

***Okay, that was about ten lines too long, but

serialkarma is feeling poorly, so I'm being nice.

ETA: OKAY, offer closed!

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*jumps on monitor and bear hugs it in hopes that it will somehow reach you*

But sometimes, sometimes, when Gregory had written Draco off altogether he would catch Draco eying him curiously as though he were actually thinking about Gregory and considering him as a real person - Yeah the love Zahra.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Will is in your icon! I knew I recognized him - was from the Kitchen Confidential commercials! *is slower than snails*

What'd I say about telling me to shut up? :)

"It could've happened to anyone."

The minute the words came out of Clark's mouth, he knew he'd screwed up, but by then it was too late, because Lex was turned interesting shades of white and red and if he'd be wearing a blue shirt, it would've been very patriotic.

Apparently, Lex wasn't getting the joke and he narrowed his eyes menacingly. "There is a reason I have a housekeeper, Clark," he said, shaking the pink boxers in Clark's face. "It's so that my clothes aren't tainted by the Super!Dork uniform.

Clark scowled. "There's no reason to resort to name-calling just because I tried to do a good deed!"

"Doing the laundry isn't a good deed!" Lex admonished. "Saving a kitten is a good deed, and about all you're good for right now anyway. Go away, I can't talk to you when all my clothes look like I just left a Greatful Dead concert."

Clark didn't pout right away, he restrained himself for at least four whole seconds. "Just remember that the next time you want clean socks," he said before brushing past Lex and going to the living room.

Clearly no good deed went unpunished.

The thing that Amber hated the most about Texas was the heat. It was always fucking hot. Stupidly fucking hot. Whomever had decided to create Texas so close to the equator needed to be shot. Sighing with the injustice of it all, she crouched down to pick up a stack of modernist books that some cheap ass student had left all over the floor of the art section. Amber hated students almost as much as she hated the heat, but it was a close call.

"Um, excuse me?" a male voice interrupted her mental vision of a thousand cheap-ass customers being sauteed by the Texas heat.

Amber caught the entirely too-bright-and-expensive white sneakers in her periphery and sighed. Maybe if she didn't look the person would just disappear; the same thing happened to her paycheck all the time. "Excuse me?" the voice repeated again.

Amber growled low in her throat, stacking the last book in her arms and slowly getting to her feet. They didn't pay her enough for this shit. "Can I help you?" she asked, only marginally masking the belligerence in her voice.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, to bother you, but I was looking for some books about hockey, because I was thinking about taking a hobby, and um --" The man's voice dropped off as Amber met his eyes, and she dropped the books she'd just picked up.

"Hi, I'm Tom," the young man said sheepishly. "Um, did you want some help with your books?"

LOL. Yes, that is Will, and the boy next to him is Steven on Kitchen Confidential, but as the actor was born in the UK I think he'd make a fabulous Goyle. Plus, you know, if Will was hiding out from Sark/Draco and Gregory was his boyfriend -- that would be a huge mess.

I still love it. I want to marry it and have it's edited little babies.

I am totally putting this in my user info. It's all anyone will ever need to know about me in one little awesome package.

He does not understand her; she knows this. She tells herself it doesn't bother her, because she understands herself enough for both of them. She understands herself and she understands him, and she cannot ask anything more of her God. Sometimes, however, sometimes the love she feels for Gaius taints her mind, and she wishes she could be released from it. She wishes she didn't love him as much as she does, and that is when she hates him. She hates Gaius, and she hates her God, and she wishes that she could be something other, something more human and less Cylon. Something that didn't think so much when Gaius was naked underneath her, but she is herself and she can ask for nothing more. And when she asks herself And you? Do you hate? she knows the answer is yes, and it's then that she realises this is her god's gift to her.

He has made her more human than she thinks she is.

Yeah I knew that was Steven/your Goyle and OMFG Yes it would be a mess. A wonderful make Ashley squeal like a pig for days kind of mess.

SO AWESOME! Thank you so so much. :)

Yes, I wrote SGA twice, and judging by the requests it's about to be three times. Egads. I've been brainwashed by all the brilliant writing and the porn, oh won't someone create a new fandom already? Ahem. For you:

Since Jack has stopped sleeping with the sheep and started sharing his bedroll with Ennis, Ennis has become a better man, a happier man. It's not that Ennis is drinking less, or working more, or that the weather has improved at all -- it's just that in those first moments of waking with Jack next to him, anything is possible for Ennis. Before his eyes are wide open, Ennis could be anywhere with Jack -- but he's always with Jack, and as long as his eyes are closed they can have everything. They can have this, and it's not a lot, but it has to be enough for when his eyes are open.

Marauders-era Sirius and Remus and...Fridays. :D

That's the best prompt EVER.

*loves*

*applause*

Thank you, thank you . . . I can just imagine of all the people who were just driven crazy by the strike (and let me tell you having to walk 40 blocks from my house to work was not something that made me happy) restaurant staffs must have been going especially nuts - and the KC staff were already nuts to begin with, so it wasn't a far fall.

It was like this: Rodney didn't like Sheppard, but that didn't stop him from finding him hot. It was the sort of sense that made no sense at all, but it was Rodney and this was Atlantis, and in the absense of any sort of mathematical equation of paradigm that could explain this phenomenon, he was going to have to take this like a man. So he did what any man would do and blamed Sheppard.

"I'm sorry, I must've mis-heard this particular bit of insanity," Sheppard said. He was doing that thing he did with his mouth and his tongue. It was the breathing thing. It was distracting.

"It's not insanity, you pea-brained moron," Rodney snapped. "It's just not sane."

Sheppard peered at Rodney closely. "You think that insulting me is going to help?"

"I don't want help!" Rodney retorted. "I want to know how you're doing it! Is it your hair? Is it Atlantis? What sort of mojo are you working on me that's making my IQ decrease so dramatically?"

Sheppard opened his mouth as though he were going to say something and then thought better of it. "Not telling," he said eventually. "It's a secret."

Rodney narrowed his eyes. "You can't keep a secret from me!"

Sheppard just winked. "Just watch me."

You always do this to me and I always fall for it. Nuts.

*cracks knuckles and ponders*

Titus Pullo is capable of great things. He is capable of great strength and great bravery, but also of great folly and great stupidity. Vorenus knows this as Caeser knows this, and Vorenus knows that if Pullo were someone besides Pullo then Vorenus would not be alone in the Senate, but wishing Pullo to be something else would require him to be someone else and Vorenus cannot have that either. Vorenus cannot have a great many things it would seem, but he contents himself with his life with Niobe and their children and believes this is enough.

Ah, I think I can kick out one more for you ;) Ahem.

"Good morning, I'm Dr O'Malley," George began, pulling back only to stop and stare. The patient stared back at him blandly, reholstering his sidearm nonchalantly and shifting his weight to display a vast expanse of bare skin. "You can't have guns in the hospital," George said matter-of-factly, clutching the chart to his chest, and resolutely not noticing that his patient was tan in the middle of December.

The patient smiled. Not the tiny, worried patient smile that George was used to getting, but the big shark smile that George only saw on Alex or Dr Bailey before she ate someone whole. "I have a permit," the patient said, reaching over the far side of the bed.

"NO!" George shouted covering his face with the chart. "No! No! No! Don't shoot me!" George hollered.

It took George a moment to realise that the entire ward was staring at him, and he lowered the chart sheepishly. The patient just smirked and shook a black button-down Oxford at George. "It's a bit chilly in here," he said matter-of-factly. "I came here to have my arm looked at, not catch cold."

George colored fiercely. "I'm so sorry, Mr," he glanced at the chart, "Mr Sark."

Mr Sark just gave George another smirk. "I'm sure it could happen to anyone."

*laughs* I adore Lex when he's put out, and there's nothing better than a pouting Clark.

Plus, the idea of Lex in tie-dye...oh, the indignity! *laughs some more*

Gotta be honest. I don't want the Super!Dork doing my laundry either. :)

Thanks so much for this! It was great fun!

I wish more writers I like (like you) wrote Prison Break!

In Seth's opinion, Martha Stewart is a genius. Not a genius like Einstein or the first guy to make a jelly-donut, but genius in a way that people that Jack and Steven just don't understand. He's watched her make an entire vegetable garden out of coloured marzipan on top of a cake on her show. In Seth's mind, that is genius. Some day he hopes to attain that sort of brilliance -- but there's no room for Martha at Nolita. Especially when Jack keeps sticking his fingers in Seth's tarts. "Do that one more time," Seth says, "just one more time and I swear I'll cut it off and serve it next to the raspberries and kiwis.

Jack just laughs. "Aw, sweetie am I ruining your masterpiece? Well too fucking bad."

"I hate you," Seth sulks.

"I know you do," Jack says. "That's why you suck such great cock."

"Who's sucking cock?" Steven hollers from the grill station. "And when can I get in?"

"NEVER!" Seth shouts back. He's surrounded by idiots, Martha would be appalled.

OMFG I love you. *throws self at you*

*giggles* Oh, good times. Love.

That is simply perfect - it's so close to being happy, yet underneath is that knowledge that this is all they can ever have.

*loves*

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Desperate times and all that.

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Now with 30% fewer typos (This is getting to be a bad habit)

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