One time for my peace of mind.

[hackthis_archive]

Today is not a good day. I must make it so.

First, by taking glee in this Grey's Anatomy casting spoiler.

And second, as created by devkel, the first 20 (sorry that was supposed to be 20, not 2) people to comment with a pairing or character and a prompt will get a one line story*. Since we all know of my inability to write anything less than ten words, it should at least be good for crack value.

The following fandoms are available: the 4400, Smallville, Harry Potter, Entourage, President Clooney-verse, SGA, Grey's Anatomy, Kitchen Confidential, BSG, Spider-Man 2, Ocean's 11, and whatever else you've seen me write before.

*One line, two lines, two paragraphs. You know it's all relative.

ETA: Okay, offer expired.

Comments

[knowledgequeen.livejournal.com]

Entourage. Lloyd. Involving a favoured or special pen.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

On the day that he graduated from Stanford with his MBA, Lloyd's father gave him a Mont Blanc (http://www.montblanc.com/products/black_resin_platinum_resin.08482.php?productDetail=true&tab1) Starwalker pen. It was a thing of beauty, made of platinum and black resin. His father said it was to sign on the dotted line for the first million dollars Lloyd would make in Hollywood.

The first day Lloyd went to work for Ari, Ari had a nervous breakdown over one of his clients and jumped up and down on Lloyd's desk. He broke Lloyd's pen.

That was the first time Lloyd thought that he should've just done something easier and gone to medical school like his brother.

[vic-ramsey.livejournal.com]

President Clooney-verse, Pres./First Man - the inaugurational ball.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

The concept of a first dance is so cliche that at their wedding Anderson refused to do give George said dance, so George danced with Anderson's mother instead until all the smirking forced Anderson to break in and steal his husband back.

On the evening of the inaugural ball, Anderson is tying his black tie in the Lincoln Bedroom with Ella Fitzgerald crooning softly and Larry King muted on CNN. When George appears behind him in the mirror, Anderson's surprised he didn't hear the Secret Service banging around outside the door first.

"Dance with me?" George says without a hint of amusement in his voice.

Anderson just raises an eyebrow. George has been rushing around all day getting ready for tonight. Anderson hasn't seen him since breakfast. He figured George was probably getting ready in the Bat Cave somewhere.

"There'll be plenty of time for dancing at the ball," Anderson says, his finger getting stuck in the bow.

"No, there'll be plenty of time for my entire party to kiss your ass, not so much time for dancing with the First Man."

George is right behind him, Anderson can smell the soap, but he can't stop looking at George's reflection in the mirror. This is his husband, and his husband is now the President of the United States. His life is totally surreal. Six years ago he was in Darfur, now he's in Washington D.C.

He sighs and finishes his tie. "One dance, Mr. President."

George's grin makes Anderson's chest hurt. "Okay, but turn off the TV first. I feel weird with Larry watching."

[fivil.livejournal.com]

Kitchen Confidential. Anything not Jack/Steven (I love them but I also love variety).

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

The thing about desserts that other people don't understand is how intensive they are. There is a real gift to the pefect creme brulee or the perfect fruit tart. Custard does not do that on its own, and meringue. Oh, the perfect meringue can bring Seth to his knees, but the rest of the kitchen don't understand that. They're all Philistines who wouldn't know chocolate Jell-o from chocolate mousse, and that's why Seth has been forced to graffiti the entire kitchen in whipped cream, because he needs respect. When Jack comes in in the morning and finds whipped cream everywhere, even in his mise-en-place, he just whistles.

"How long did this take you?" he asks Seth admiringly.

Seth just crosses his arms, he lost feeling in his fingers around the 25th container of whipped cream. "A chef never shares his secrets," he says solemnly, right before pasting Jack in the face with a banana cream pie.

[musesfool.livejournal.com]

I'm tempted to ask for Remus/Sirius, but I will say Danny/Rusty, instead. Diamonds are a girl's best friend.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Rusty rubs the fogged up bathroom mirror and cocks his head to the side, considering his reflection for long seconds.

White towel, check.

Wet hair, check.

Diamond tiara stolen from a Turkish bath house, check.

The tiara is a little ostentatious for him, but hey, for $20 million ostentatious is okay.

"Aw, princess, you finally found yourself a crown," Danny says shoving Rusty's clothes into his arms. Basher's waiting in the alley in towel delivery van.

"I always knew my prince would come." Rusty bats his eyelashes rapidly before dropping his towel. "It just took you a little while."

Choices

[ladydey.livejournal.com]

President Clooney-verse, no pairing - Pardoning the Thanksgiving Turkey

and/or

Kitchen Confidential, writer's choice pairing - slumming at a theme restaurant (the kookier the theme the better and more humiliating)

Re: Choices

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Ari hates his job sometimes. Not when he's scaring the piss out of the rest of the staff, or when he's fighting with Oprah at cabinet meetings, or when he and Lewis get to spar with the press, but other days like when he has to deal with shit like the pardoning of the Thanksgiving Turkey.

"I'm not having George pardoning shit," he snaps at the White House head cook. "That's a damn good turkey and I want your ass to pluck it, behead it, and have it on the dining room table for the President at 3 fucking pm on Thursday just like the good little ass monkey you are."

Jack doesn't even pretend not to roll his eyes. "Don't you think I should behead it before I pluck it?"

"I knew this geezer once --" Steven begins.

"I don't give a shit if you knew a geezer who fucked turkeys, just do this without a lot of grief, Bourdain!" Ari spits.

Jack just shrugs. "Okay, you can tell the First Man you told me to axe Harold, but I don't think he'll be real happy about it."

"Anderson named it Harold?" Ari whines. "I hate this job sometimes."

[romanticalgirl.livejournal.com]

BSG: Helo/Lee. Vixen

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

I just wrote you 150 words! I knew you were going to get in here and make me think I should've cut-n-pasted! Okay, I will prompt from that last snippet.

[melodylemming.livejournal.com]

President Clooney-verse. The late days of the presidential campaign.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

George is over this being president thing. He's tired of the press and the speeches and the hand-shaking communicable colds and Ari obsessing over whether or not George has enough Purex to sanitize his hands.

George is over the campaign meetings and being called names in the paper, and Jon having tantrums because Stephen is the only one keeping George sane most days.

But mostly he's over sleeping on a bus as he cris-crosses the country.

If he wasn't having nightly satellite phone sex with Anderson, while Anderson is off sweet-talking the UN, George would be a very unhappy camper.

[aphelant.livejournal.com]

Chuck the gate tech, SGA (because there isn't enough Chuck in our fandom). ;)

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

You are so under the delusion that I watch enough SGA to know anything about Chuck, but for you, I will fake it.


Nobody knows Chuck. Nobody knows that he likes chocolate chip cookie dough raw, or that he lost his virginity to Terri Sue Majors when he was 18. Nobody knows that Chuck really likes manga and trades the janitor on the Dedalus Athosian tea to bring him the latest trades from home. Nobody knows that Chuck isn't American at all and that once upon a time he was a great freedom fighter and that he helped save the world from the most evil man wizarding kind had ever seen, but Harry -- Chuck, he's just Chuck now. Right. Anyway, nobody knows Chuck anymore, there are spells to make certain of this, and that's kind of how he likes it.

[cosmic.livejournal.com]

woo! President Clooney/Jake Gyllenhaal.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

George used to have a life where he could do everyday things like go to the movies and hang out with Max on Sunday and sit around in his underwear and scratch himself. Actually, George hasn't been able to do that last one since he met Anderson, but he likes to delude himself when he can.

Sometimes, if George is feeling really deluded, he'll call up Jake and Jake will tell him about whatever flavor of the month Jake's dating and George will live vicariously through him. It may be a little sketchy, but it's not as though George is getting blow jobs in the Oval Office, and what Anderson and Stephen and Jon and Ari don't know can't hurt him.

Sometimes, George doesn't even wonder what would've happened if he'd said yes when Jake asked him out at the 2006 Oscars.

[thepouncer.livejournal.com]

4400. Shawn. Drifting petals.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Shawn's in a field of poppies, gorgeous, bright red, vibrant poppies. Shawn's only ever seen poppies in The Wizard of Oz, but he knows that's what they are, and when he bends down to smell them, they smell like the expensive perfume Isabelle thought would impress him so much. He never told her he didn't like perfume, she always tried so hard for him, he thought it would be wrong to crush her spirit. Except that when Shawn picks one of the poppies the petals instantly fall away, and it feels as though his spirit is being crushed and he remembers how she tried to kill him.

[oxoniensis.livejournal.com]

GA, Bailey, pee.

Sorry - it was the first prompt word that came into my head - it's been one of *those* days at work! *g*

Is there anything I can do to make it a better day for you?

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Pee is the first thing that came into your head? Pee on it! God, I miss when Lost was good. I digress. Pee, huh?

All day long Miranda deals with other people's bodily fluids: blood, sweat, tears, shit, piss. At work she calls them by their medical names platelets, excrement, feces, urine, when she gets home though, she's off duty. She's just a wife, she's just mommy, she's just pretty sure that Addison should've told her to put a cloth over the baby when she changes his diaper, because who knew someone so little could shoot a stream of urine so far into the air.

[amberlynne.livejournal.com]

I don't see Supernatural on that list. *gasp* How can that be?

Oh whatever. Let me have my fantasies. ;P

Um, how about Blaise/Draco and Halloween?

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Gag.

Blaise like Samhain for the spells and the candy and the fact this his mother always let him go out and throw rotten eggs at Muggle children on the 31st of October. No, wait, that's Draco. Blaise can't actually be arsed to care about Samhain this year or last year or next year or any other year. Mostly he just likes to sit at home and watch the new stupid box that Theodore had created especially for him. Blaise has been to Queenie's house and he's seen her stupid box, but Theodore made this one specially for Blaise. It has the BBC and the inside of George Clooney's office (the one Ravenclaw that Blaise would undoubtedly shag) and Blaise's favorite channel of them all, the Tom Brady locker room channel.

Yeah, Blaise loves this channel.

[jeannie81.livejournal.com]

Bill/Draco, both are meeting president Clooney to talk about the (wizarding) war. They're put together in a hotel room.

I can't think under pressure, this is what I come up with *sighs*.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

*blinks*

Oh, yeah, sure, why not give me a hard one. Okay, I will think on this and get back to you.

[storydivagirl.livejournal.com]

Entourage - Eric/Vince

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Aw, bless.

Eric is in love with love. It's stupid, but it's so true. Vince has watched E with Kristen the Bitch and Emily the Entirely Too Cool for E and now, E's with Sloan the Uber Cool and Posh, and she's so far out of E's league that it kind of makes Vince's chest hurt. And with each girl since Harriet Thurman in kindergarten Vince has watched Eric fall in love and get broken and then get up and try all over again. The harder he tries, the further he falls, the more he hurts, the more Vince loves him. The more Vince wants to tell him to stop trying so hard.

Eric doesn't have to be in love with love, he just has to admit that he's in love with Vince.

[mellafe.livejournal.com]

BSG: Lee/Kara, rain

or

HP: Harry/Draco, "I can only give you all I've got"

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

It was the sort of thing that only made sense later on. The wanting Kara thing, because Lee had a girlfriend, a good girlfriend. She would make a good wife one day too. She wasn't pissy and arrogant. She didn't talk back. She wanted kids and a good, nice, safe life. She was nothing like Kara at all. Kara who smoked and swore and would sit in the sims all night playing and beating people for credits and ambrosia and anything else they could get their hands on. Lee's girlfriend wasn't going to beat Lee's ass at triad in the mess hall or pyramid in the rain. Lee's girlfriend was never going to look at him across the mess hall and make Lee's chest hurt either. Sometimes Lee couldn't even remember her name.

[aurora]

SGA, Rodney's deepest secret. :D

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

It's the Meredith thing. Rodney really does blame his parents for this. If they had named him something manly like Butch or Joe or Michael or 'Very Macho Son' then he would be manly and wear boxers or chain metal or leather thongs, which is what Ronon probably wears. Unless he's not wearing anything, but Rodney isn't going to go there. The point being if he'd had a proper name he never have developed this predilection for women's pink cotton panties, but he does. Not to keep, please, he has some standards. Just to wear. They can be a little snug in the front, but the cotton is good. It breathes. Rodney's all about breathing, and apparently all about the pink cotton underwear. He wonders what John would say about this, and then he has to go change his underwear.

[violentviolethp.livejournal.com]

Oooh, Grey's Anatomy. Something good happening to George for once. (If you are so inclined, a Harry Potter cross-over *RON* wouldn't go amiss.)

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

You are stumping me. Give me another day.

[sandrine]

The 4400, Shawn/Tom, fights. *hopeful look* (In case that's too weird, Kitchen Confidential, Mimi/Jack, same prompt.) :)

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Damn. Y'all are tough customers.

When Shawn was little he always envied Kyle. He wanted a dad like Uncle Tom. Shawn always wanted the dad who made the slightly burnt cookies and who took them camping and knew how to start a fire with two sticks. He once tried to get Kyle to run away from home just so Shawn could have Uncle Tom to himself. That didn't work out. Kyle was pissed at him for a long time about that. And now when he looks at Jordan he can sort of see bits of him Uncle Tom in him. He guesses that's why he tries to fight his attraction so hard.

[moosesal.livejournal.com]

Entourage, Turtle/Drama, breakfast

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Finally, one that I can write without killing myself.

Drama is not a good cook. He's an okay cook, but he's not Turtle's ma. Turtle's ma is a fucking great cook, which he tells Drama all the time. "Drama, what the fuck is this? You can't put tofu in eggs!"

"Vince needs protein, there's protein in tofu!"

"There's protein in steak, how come you don't make steak and eggs instead?"

"All that cholesterol isn't good for Vince's heart, or yours. You could stand to lay off the meat, Turtle, go for a run here or there."

"One more word about my shape and you'll be sorry."

"I'm already sorry."

"Don't make me start telling everyone that you touched my ass during that threesome."

"I didn't touch your ass!"

"Did so!"

"Did not!"

*pause*

"If I did, it's only cos you liked it."

[visionofblue]

I...may have missed the cutoff. In that case, totally ignore me.

SGA, Rodney/Ronon, growl

[trevorfrost.livejournal.com]

I don't know whether you have seen this article or not but it made me think of you..
http://apnews.excite.com/article/20061002/D8KGONJG0.html

ooh Am i under the wire if so
Spider-Man 2, Peter/Harry, Liquor

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

You indeed are the last contest! Good on you!

[fatema.livejournal.com]

SQUEE! Now THAT'S a fantastic cast addition!

[melodylemming.livejournal.com]

Hee. "Hand-shaking communicable colds."