For your continued amusement - HP - H/N/D

In an e-mail to serialkarma I said:

…I bought this banana at the commissary and it's like a mutant banana. When the woman gave it to me, I thought 'damn, that's a big banana' and then I peeled [it] and it my brain was like, dude 'that banana is fucking huge, it's, like, bigger than a penis.'

So then I had to measure the banana. It's nine inches long and two inches wide.

This is a HUGE fucking banana. I would not want to have sex with anything this size. It'd fucking hurt.

Not that I’m fucking a banana. C’mon. Bananas are for practicing rolling on condoms and blatant phallic imagery, nothing more.

Moving along...

According to circe_tigana and JKR:

Theodore Nott is canon’s Blaise Zabini. So really I should go Neville/Theodore/Draco instead of Neville/Blaise/Draco. Does anybody even *know* anything about Theodore? Can I make him Cillian Murphy?

I think I’ll write some porn now or something. Oh, nuts. I’d promised switchknife Neville porn, didn’t I? I'm not one to welch.

Harry Potter
Harry/Neville/Draco (NC-17ish)

( Maybe Next Year Will Be Better Than The Last )