O11/HP – My Brother's Keeper (The One with the Cackle Bladder)

I still can't string more than a few words together. Clearly this is just a figment of your imagination, so the three of you who share these two fandoms with me can thank zeplum.

Ocean's 11/ Harry Potter <-- no, that's not a typo.
Rusty. Danny. Narcissa. Lucius. Other people, too.


My Brother's Keeper (The One with the Cackle Bladder)



( Robertus Nero Phineas Malfoy met Daniel Ocean fresh off of the TransColonial Floo from London. Actually, Robertus wasn't fresh, he was smelly and stale from travel with soot in his ears and smeared on his cheeks. He had 68 Galleons, 13 Sickles and 2 Knuts in his pocket, and he had no idea what he was going to do with himself in America. He was a Malfoy and Malfoys weren't particularly well known for their work ethic. )

I'm cleaning out my Never Gonna Get Sorted folder.

Battlestar Galactica
Helo. Kara.

You Are My Sunshine


Karl Agathon was given the call sign ‘Helo’ by his friend/drinking buddy/workout buddy/would-be-sister, Kara Thrace. Originally, Karl had thought it was just a nickname for his home, Mt. Helios -- the name seemed close enough. It was only much later on, after graduation from the Academy, after Zak died but before the Cylon attack, that Kara told him that she’d picked it out, not for his home, but for his disposition.

Helios was a sun god, and Karl was always optimistic and bright about everything Kara complained, and it was frakking irritating. The Lords hadn’t mean for anyone to be so joyous all the frakking time, and one day Karl was going to be sorry for being such a happy bastard.

Karl laughed and slung Kara over his shoulder in a Fireman’s Carry, since she was three sheets to the wind and had slurred most of the entire explanation.

It was a testament to their relationship that he knew Kara would’ve kicked anyone else in the balls for daring to pick her up in such a manner, but with him she just belched really loudly and warned him that if he dropped her she was going to hurl on his shoes.

He patted her on her thigh, the safest area he could reach without dropping her on her head. “Don’t worry, Starbuck,” he said placatingly, pausing to blink several times so he could reduce the number of sidewalks before him to a manageable number. “Nobody would notice if you got brain damage anyway.”

Kara made a noise of displeasure and pinched Helo's ass. “Just for that I’m telling everyone that you’re gay.”

Helo made a derisive snort. He hadn’t been gay in years. “Like anybody would believe anything you say anyway.”

“Everybody believes what I say,” Kara paused. “What was I saying?”

Helo snorted again. “Exactly.”

SGA – Basic Tenets

This is the last of the cleaning out files. I'd wanted to write something grand, meaningful, and fabulous for this concept, but alas with a hackthis story you get snark and sarcasm, and more snark and sarcasm, and occasionally some porn, crack, and angst, because that's just what I have.

Stargate: Atlantis
McKay/Sheppard
For the M.I.A. serialkarma

Basic Tenets


( 'Official something or other' is code for 'You are upsetting the minions. Cease and desist at once' )