It's my right to be contrary!

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I’ve been sick for four days.

Did I mention that I am the world’s crankiest sick person? I'm running around cursing just because. When ethrosdemon asked what she could do to make it better I asked her to kill fictional characters for me. Or do something snarky. A fictional character being snarky about their own death would be better than chocolate - which I cannot have right now.

Other things I have decided in my 72 hours of cabin fever:

1. Jet, the 80’s band which sang ‘I’ve Got a Crush on You’ is vastly preferable to Jet, singers of ‘Are You Gonna Be My Girl’ even though I do like the latter. (Mad props to serialkarma)

2. If I eat another bowl of chicken soup/chicken broth/chicken anything, I will lay an egg.

3. I don’t really like Messiah Complex Protagonists. I don’t like Superman. Or Clark Kent. Or Harry Potter. This does not stop me reading or writing about them, but it does stop me from empathizing with them. It stops me from appreciating them the way I do characters I can empathaize with, like say, Lex or Faith or Neville. I think you should save the world because you think it's worth saving and you want to, not because someone says you have to. I hate it when people pull that obligation shit. ETN: This is not some gauntlet I'm throwing down to player-hate on Superman. This is not some Smallville-esque ode to Clark's characterization either; I've never been into Superman. I've always preferred Batman to Supes and Plastic Man to both. I'm more Everyman than Ubermensch.

4. I like accidental heroes. Like Neville. And Plastic Man.

5. I don’t like the Justice League cartoon. This has no bearing on my massive collection of JLA comic books (issue #92 in stands now), because as I said in #3, I heart Plastic Man. But I highly doubt that the Cartoon Network is going to put the deadbeat father who’s, gasp, not model material, at their animated table. Their loss.

6. MS Words sucks ass.

7. If I don't get out the house soon there's going to be an accident.

Comments

Hmm. Death and snark. Kind of.

[serialkarma.livejournal.com]

"Well, Potter, when I said I wanted you to get squished like a small furry rodent, I have to admit, this is not exactly how I imagined it happening," Draco said, his neck craned at an uncomfortable angle as he watched as the sun was blotted out above his head.

"Well, Malfoy, I have to say, when I said I hoped you'd end up ground into little tiny pieces someday, I was kind of hoping I'd get a chance to do it myself. I didn't really mean this, though. Wish I knew what went wrong." Harry didn't bother looking up. He was busy closely inspecting his wand, as though if he looked hard enough a little flag would pop out of the end with a sign that read "Ha Ha! Fooled you!"

"You're an incompetent wizard, Potter you git, that's what went wrong. My only comfort is knowing that you've screwed yourself over as well as me. Also, I find it tremendously amusing that Voldemort will have won the war by forfeit, as it were." There was a great whooshing sound now and Draco's hair flew around his head as he spoke. He still hadn't bothered to actually look at Harry.

"Yeah," said Harry glumly. "Bit embarrassing, that, really. You know, Malfoy--"

But whatever Harry would have told him was cut off, forever, as the hawk swooped down over the tiny, shrunken figures in the grass, snatched them up, swallowed them both down and went on in search of more substantial prey. It was kind of hoping for a fat chipmunk. These little hairless creatures were too crunchy.

Re: Hmm. Death and snark. Kind of.

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