OCFF

Feb. 5th, 2004 08:49 am
[personal profile] hackthis_archive
Warning: There is HET in this LJ entry. If this is something that offends you, or could possibly scar you for life, move along, there’s nothing to see here. (Don’t worry, we’ll return to the norm ASAP)

OCFF Challenge
Seth/Summer
Female of the Species





Seth does not get women; he knows this. It’s not because he doesn’t want to understand them in all their soft, pretty, sarcastic glory, but because they just don’t speak his language. At all.

When and he and Anna were dating they totally loved the same things, but that didn’t necessarily translate to speaking the same language, and sometimes he had no clue what she was talking about. Marissa, well, ever since he discovered that she listens to punk, too, he doesn’t know what to think about her. He and his mom have never communicated the way that he and his dad do, and most times he and Ryan only need to exchange a glance to say loads of things. Okay, most times Seth will still say all those things that could go unsaid, but it’s not as though it’s mandatory for him to say them, he just likes talking. Seth loves the way words feel on his lips and his tongue, and he can taste the chocolate peanut butter cups that Summer must’ve had after school.

Was he thinking about something else besides her?

“Don’t get the wrong idea,” Summer announces as she fastens the snaps on her skirt and smoothes the wrinkles out of her shirt. It’s a nice shirt, very flattering. Seth doesn’t think many girls could carry off the fuchsia and orange thing, but it is Summer, and it’s not like she’s an ordinary girl or anything.

No, Summer is definitely not an ordinary anything.

Seth glances up from making his bed look a little less ‘Oh my god, I just groped Summer Roberts in my bedroom!’ and more ‘I really haven’t made my bed since I was eight.’

He vaguely recalls that she was informing him of something she considered important, and he was too busy staring to pay much attention. He should probably work on that, just as soon as he stops drooling.

“This would imply that I have an idea of what you’re talking about in the first place,” he quips. “I mean I have an idea, I’m just not sure it’s the right idea, or the one that you’d approve of. Not that I need your approval or anything, because so not my mom, or even my girlfriend as you like to point out every five seconds. So why would I have any ideas in the first place? Unless we’re talking about how DC Comics can expand the Teen Titans brand, and –“

“Cohen!”

The tilt of her head says it all, and Seth stops mid-ramble, duly mollified.

“As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, this totally doesn’t change anything.” Summer’s pulling on designer shoes by some guy that Seth has never heard of that she got at some sale that was apparently really important. At least that was impression he got when she called him to tell him about her ‘most gorgeous shoes ever’ and didn’t stop to breathe for 90 minutes.

He scratches at his head before slipping his tee shirt over messy curls, and nods as though he has any idea what she’s talking about.

She pushes him aside to get to his full-length mirror, but it’s not like she looks anything less than gorgeous. If Seth hadn’t just been rolling around in his bed with her, he never would’ve known she’d been doing anything. It must be a female thing.

“This doesn’t mean I like you or anything,” she says, rearranging hair that’s not even out of place. “So don’t get any ideas.”

“Riiiight.” Seth nods knowingly and taps his nose; they have this conversation at least six times a week. Sometimes it’s before they make out; sometimes it’s after. Occasionally they have this conversation in the middle of the school day. If she tells him that sex does not entitle him to a relationship one more time, he might scream. Except he’s been told he screams like a girl, and that just wouldn’t be cool.

He manages only to grunt when she elbows him in the ribs. “Don’t be patronizing, if I want that I’ll, like, go home or something.”

“Now why would you want to go home, when you’re just going to come back here again?” Seth is honestly curious at this point. The only girl who spends more time at his house than Marissa is Summer. For somebody who doesn’t like him, she sure does visit a lot.

“Don’t get smart with me,” Summer says, elbowing him in the ribs again. The second noise he makes is decidedly high-pitched. He can’t believe he takes this sort of assault from her. This is what having a crush on someone since the fifth-grade does to people.

“I could totally have anybody I want,” Summer says.

Seth nods his head in agreement. “So why exactly are you with me again?”

“I’m not with you,” Summer insists as she pushes him aside, again, and attempts to straighten the sheets on his bed.

She only makes it worse.

“Your domestic skills are even worse than mine,” he says, gently moving her away to artfully rearrange his comforter properly.

“Are you saying I don’t know how to make a bed?”

Seth even finds Summer’s nostril flaring erotic. He’s clearly out of his mind.

Her eyes narrow, and Seth takes two steps back. “Rage –“

“I meant that you shouldn’t have to clean up after anybody,” he corrects in the nick of time. “I mean there are some people who are meant to clean and cook, and hey, they know what they’re doing. Like Ryan, he’s totally a great cook, and he fixes his own bike. Very good with the DIY, totally the man to have around in a crisis, but my mom on the other hand, really not good with the do-it-yourself. We don’t even like to let her toast her own bagels, because you know 75% of all accidents happen in the kitchen, and –“

Seth loses his train of thought when Summer pushes him back on the bed, and climbs up to straddle his legs.

“You need to talk less and listen to me more,” she says.

“That sounds like something a girlfriend would say,” he points out as she leans down to kiss him.

“Don’t be stupid,” Summer says.


*



Seth doesn’t claim to be the smartest kid in school. The geekiest, sure, although maybe Arnold Scott has that title now that his glasses prescription has him seeing through glasses thicker than a CD case. Even if Seth's not The Most Geeky, he’s pretty close though, and he’s definitely the most knowledgeable about X-Men and the Age of Apocalypse. But, The Smartest Guy at Harbor? No. And if he knows he’s not the smartest, then he can freely admit that he has no idea how girls think the things they do.

“We are so not involved,” Summer says, just before she drags him behind the stairwell to the second floor and kisses away the brain cells he’d reserved for Holden Caulfield, his flap-eared cap and Catcher in the Rye.

Seth just nods his head. Anything to keep her kissing him.

“I mean it, Cohen,” she says, nipping at his bottom lip entirely too hard. Not that Seth is complaining about making out with the hottest girl in school, but Ryan’s going to look at him really funny if his mouth looks like Mick Jagger’s after school.

“Say it,” she demands.

“Say what?”

“You’re not my boyfriend.”

“You’re not my boyfriend,” he parrots.

When she stomps on his foot, he wonders why men put up with women driving them crazy this way.

“Don’t tell me that hurt,” she whispers in his ear as he doubles over in pain. The look he gives her says it all though. At least he hopes it does, because really, she’s killing him here. Then she purses her lips in annoyance, and he forgets to complain.

“Don’t be such a wimp,” she says, kissing him lightly before walking away.

“You’re the one who’s not going out with me!” he calls after her loudly.

The death-glare she shoots back at him says it all.


*



Summer’s in the living room when he comes home from the literary magazine, and while on one hand this is the stuff that his best wet dreams are made of, on the other hand, it’s way freaky.

She really has to stop attacking Seth every time he walks into an empty room.

It’s not that he minds the kissing and the groping, because, hey, those are totally of the good; but it’s the way her super-stealth moves put his to shame that’s really driving him crazy.

One minute Seth thinks he’s alone and talking to himself, and the next, bam!, there she is, dragging him against a spare wall and sucking his brain out his head. Admittedly they’ve only kissed so many times, but there was that time she accosted him in the guest house, and then there was the one on the boat, and he’s afraid that one day he’s going to wake up and she’s going to be there, and he’s going to do something stupid and childish like scream his head off.

Summer has this overwhelming way of making him act insane. He pushes her away, not because he wants to, but because his parents are bound to get home any minute and he’s really not into the catcalls and his father talking about his kissing technique.

“What? Why are we stopping?” she demands, as he holds her at arm length.

He winces when she pouts. The pouting thing is totally unfair. “My house. You’re here. How’d you get in here anyway?”

“Your dad let me in.”

“You were here, alone, with my dad?” The idea makes Seth’s palms sweat. The horror.

“Your dad is totally great,” Summer says, trying to move closer again. “He said he had all these baby pictures he wanted to show me, I think he went to go get them.”

For once the sudden loss of blood to Seth's head has nothing to do with Summer’s proximity or how many injuries she’s caused him, and Seth just knows he’s going to faint or something. He only snaps out of it when Summer begins rubbing his arm. It’s possibly the most soothing gesture she’s ever shown him, and he hopes she’s not about to ruin it all by having a rage blackout or something.

“Cohen, relax, I was joking. You’re not, like, going to faint on me or something, are you? That would be so lame, and I can’t date somebody who’s fainting all the time -- if I wanted that, I’d be with Coop. And your dad’s totally, like, down at the beach or something, he said I could wait for you here.”

Seth exhales a breath he didn’t even know he was holding, and his brain starts racing at the influx of news. Summer and Marissa? Dating who? What? Why didn’t anybody tell him? He hates being the last one to know. Maybe they’ll let him watch if he begs enough.

“You’re dating Marissa?” he demands, figuring the most pressing information should come first.

Summer gives him a look that says it all, but she still takes the time to spell it out for him, which is nice, because he just doesn’t get girls sometimes. “What? Okay, ew, no. I love Coop, but just, no. She’s like got issues and also, just, no.”

Seth shakes his head and steps around Summer to sit down on the sofa. He’s slightly surprised when she follows. She’s wearing red and blue today with gold earrings, and he’s totally having Wonder Woman flashbacks. Plus, he’s sitting on his living room sofa with Summer, and they’re having, like, an intense conversation or something. At least he thinks they are. But he gets confused when she starts kissing him, again.

“No,” he says pushing her away while his brain screams in horror. Even his internal Seth screams like a girl. “No more making out.”

Summer crosses her arms and the look she gives him has Rage Blackout written all over it.

“I’m serious,” Seth continues on quickly, hoping to avert natural disaster. “Either you agree to date me, and you know, do the dating thing or I’m withdrawing all sexual favors.”

“Right, because there were so many,” Summer says dryly.

“I’m serious.” Seth has every intention of sticking to his guns, or standing his ground or something, clearly this is why he has no smart comebacks on the tip of his tongue. “I know you’ve been saying we’re not together or whatever. But we’ve been doing a lot of this not together thing – we’ve been doing it for almost six weeks, and a man has to have some standards or something.”

“You are so stupid, Cohen,” she says, pushing Seth’s shoulder lightly. “One, you’re not a man, you’re Cohen. Two, it’s been six weeks and two days, get it right, and if the lack of other boys hasn’t clued you in then I have no idea why we’re together.”

Seth’s mouth opens and closes like this goldfish he used to have, Nate Gray. “So, we’ve been together all this time and –“

“You were so not paying attention. I can’t believe you weren’t paying attention. Also, you owe me a one month anniversary present; I’ve already picked it out. And don’t think that just because we’re dating I’m going to read comic books or play on that Playstation thing with you, because, no. Okay?”

For the first time in ages, Seth is effectively rendered speechless. Instead of answering he just nods his head and listens as Summer details the rest of the do’s and don’ts and Rules for Dating Summer Roberts.

When Summer says, “Under no circumstances are you allowed to wear any polyester. Are you listening to me, Cohen?” Seth nods his head as though this is the most serious conversation in his entire life.

When Summer curls up next to him and kicks her shoes off, Seth makes a point of resting his hand on her shoulder lightly and stroking her hair while she talks. She gestures wildly and talks rapidly, and Seth just smiles and makes encouraging noises when she pauses. It’s taken him a little while, but he’s starting to realize that it doesn’t really matter what guys and girls say to each other, what’s important is pretending to listen.



-end-

+ The Challenge was as follows: Summer/Seth. There should be bickering. And kissing. The Playstation should make an appearance.

+ Much love and adoration to [livejournal.com profile] serialkarma for listening to me whinge and moan and complain about pretty much everything. She rocks! – and she betad! Title from the song by Space.


+ Written for [livejournal.com profile] dirty_diana for the OCFF challenge. Also for [livejournal.com profile] ethrosdemon, because this is never happening again. Happy Birthday, Baby Girl.

Date: 2004-02-05 05:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lugonn.livejournal.com
There is HET in this LJ entry.
Argh!!!! The humanity! I'll have to read this later once I work up my courage.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-05 07:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lugonn.livejournal.com
Beautiful. You can even make het sound appealing. :)
I loved Summer in this, but I frequently love Summer. And clueless, confused, off-balance Seth is always classic. Good ending.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
Beautiful. You can even make het sound appealing. :)

*cracks up*

You should've seen my horror when I first got the challenge.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lugonn.livejournal.com
Another person on my flist was traumatized that she had to do a het pairing -- she'd never written het before and never wanted to do het. I told her it could have been worse, she could have been asked to write a likable Marissa. She replied that she would have been forced to default on the challenge if that had happened.

Date: 2004-02-05 05:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] crimsonclad.livejournal.com
“You are so stupid, Cohen,” she says, pushing Seth’s shoulder lightly. “One, you’re not a man, you’re Cohen. Two, it’s been six weeks and two days, get it right, and if the lack of other boys hasn’t clued you in then I have no idea why we’re together.”

Never happening again? But it was so perfect and sweet and hot and them, and okay, I get that many fandoms regard a love of het as a kink, but you do it so well.

She picked out their anniversary present and I love it. Amazing.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
Never happening again? But it was so perfect and sweet and hot and them, and okay, I get that many fandoms regard a love of het as a kink, but you do it so well.

Don't get me wrong, as a canon pairing, I love Seth/Summer. They're snarky and hot, and did I mention the snark? But, you know, I get all that on the show; I don't get Ryan/Seth on telly. But maybe, one day, if I'm very very good...

Date: 2004-02-05 05:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tigress35.livejournal.com
This was soooo Summer! Great work hon!

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
Thank you very much, sweetie, I'm glad you liked it.

Date: 2004-02-05 05:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] voleuse.livejournal.com
Fecking brilliant, as usual. I can't stop giggling at clueless!Seth and stealth!Summer. Cuuuuuute!

he’s definitely the most knowledgeable about X-Men and the Age of Apocalypse.

If he is, then I call dibs.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
he’s definitely the most knowledgeable about X-Men and the Age of Apocalypse.

If he is, then I call dibs.


*Checks list and makes placard*

Okay, you are number 1,628 in line. I recommend bringing a long book for the wait.

Date: 2004-02-05 05:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blueandomlettes.livejournal.com
I don't think I could have handled the Het if it was with Anna or anyone else actually but with Summer it works. And works FLAWLESSLY. This could be because summer is just a girl gay man. So you see this really wasn't het at all, you shouldn't scare people like that you know.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
This could be because summer is just a girl gay man. So you see this really wasn't het at all, you shouldn't scare people like that you know.

*dies laughing*

Date: 2004-02-05 06:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] callmesandy.livejournal.com
Way awesome! Very Summer and Seth, very cute. I love your Seth voice so much. And she picked out their anniversary gift, hee.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
I'm so pleased you enjoyed it, thank you for commenting!

Date: 2004-02-05 10:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thepouncer.livejournal.com
Seth/Summer is my het pairing of choice on The O.C. (My het OTP is Sandy/Kirsten) I loved the bickering and Seth's general cluelessness. Also, his satisfaction at the end was incredibly sweet.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
(My het OTP is Sandy/Kirsten)

Word. Just one big plate of WORD. I'm glad that canned that Rachel storyline, it was ridiculous.

Date: 2004-02-05 11:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] smallcondo.livejournal.com
You got Summer down pat! I love those crazy kids.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
*laughs*

I'm glad you enjoyed this, thanks!

Date: 2004-02-06 02:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dirty-diana.livejournal.com
Eeeeeeeeeeee!

*takes a deep breath*

I think I may love you. This rocked. Love your Summer. And I appreciate that you snuck a Marissa/Summer mention in there. :) Loved it.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
I was wondering when I would hear from you!

I'm so pleased you enjoyed it, thank you!

Date: 2004-02-06 01:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quinnponders.livejournal.com
Damn, you even make het pretty.

::bows at your feet::

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
I try, sweetie, I'm so glad you enjoyed this!

Date: 2004-02-06 04:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] randomeliza.livejournal.com
Gah. This was... are you SURE you're not a writer for the OC? Because this was so, like, exactly how they should be that I'm convinced I've already seen this episode. Summer and Seth are both almost scarily in-character. Also:

“Your dad is totally great,” Summer says, trying to move closer again. “He said he had all these baby pictures he wanted to show me, I think he went to go get them.”

Eeeeevil. *grins* This may have been het, but it was absolutely perfect. Thanks for temporarily overcoming your squick -- definitely worth it.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-06 06:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
Gah. This was... are you SURE you're not a writer for the OC? Because this was so, like, exactly how they should be that I'm convinced I've already seen this episode. Summer and Seth are both almost scarily in-character.

Judging by the lack of bling lacing my neck, I'm going to have to say that I am most like *not* writing for the OC, but I'm so pleased that you felt this was that in character. Thanks for commenting!

Date: 2004-02-08 07:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miasma286.livejournal.com
Wow. That's some fucking brilliant het.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-11 07:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
Thank you, I'm glad you liked it!

Date: 2004-02-10 02:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ethrosdemon.livejournal.com
Seth doesn’t think many girls could carry off the fuchsia and orange thing,

Um, I might have that shirt. Just sayin'.

At least that was impression he got when she called him to tell him about her ‘most gorgeous shoes ever’ and didn’t stop to breathe for 90 minutes.

I'm so crushing on her.

“You need to talk less and listen to me more,” she says.

“That sounds like something a girlfriend would say,” he points out as she leans down to kiss him.

“Don’t be stupid,” Summer says.


I so love them and how you write them, my dear.

and he’s definitely the most knowledgeable about X-Men and the Age of Apocalypse.

UM. LOVE. So much love.

“Don’t be such a wimp,” she says, kissing him lightly before walking away.

You need to write a story set in the TAverse with Summer in a bar fight. Maybe dating Colin Farrell...what?

“What? Okay, ew, no. I love Coop, but just, no. She’s like got issues and also, just, no.”

Summer is the new Cordelia. I mean, seriously.

Seth’s mouth opens and closes like this goldfish he used to have, Nate Gray.

All these Xmen shouties, I could just DIE.

Awwwwwwwwww. They are cute. And I mean that in the non-gag-worthy way.

Re:

Date: 2004-02-11 07:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hackthis.livejournal.com
Summer is the new Cordelia. I mean, seriously.

Dude, I didn't realize how much I'd missed Cordy until I saw her last week, and then I was all 'Why Joss, Why?' Also, I am v v glad you liked it, since I had to harangue you to read it. I see you are v busy though, so I will leave you to it.

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