SW RPS - Nugation
Jun. 15th, 2005 03:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
a) If you're not a member of
ewan_hayden but you're reading this LJ for the RPS, you are so missing out.
b) I reckon everyone knows about
iharthdarth by now, but if you don't well, go see for yourself. Theme music, people!
c) You know that Jamie sings, but did you know that Ryan does too? ;)
d)
issaro wanted to know why I was not churning out the porn for Mr Right Now Fandom to which I answered (strangely enough) that I just had an internal block that meant it wasn't going to happen in the traditional sense. This is not the part where we discuss my one moral or the wrongness of RPS or the sanctity of marriage or actions v. thoughts. Like
issaro says 'it's all pretend anyhow!'
For
ethrosdemon,
fearlessdiva and
issaro -- a companion piece to The Man Who Sold the World
Star Wars RPS
Some Ewan/Hayden... some Viggo/Orli... some Jude/other. You know how that gets.
Nugation
The second thing Ewan thinks when he meets Viggo Mortensen on the set of Diurnal Tide is that Viggo's mustache makes him look like a 70s porn star. It's not the most charitable thought Ewan's ever had, but he's currently being crushed by a man two stone heavier, and ten years older than him, who smells of stale cigarettes and sleeping outdoors for at least a week. Some people would be repulsed, but Ewan just laughs and hugs Viggo back.
One look at the grin on Viggo's face, and Ewan knows he made the right choice with this film. His agent, Bernie, wanted him to do some 'commercially viable' dreck, but Star Wars is enough 'commercially viable' crap for the rest of Ewan's life, so bollocks to that.
Ewan's going to make art with Viggo Mortensen, and the world isn't going to know what to do with itself when they're done with Chris Nolan's script and direction.
Yeah, this is exactly what Ewan needs right now: Nova Scotia's freezing winter, Viggo Mortensen's porn-star moustache, and the blessing of his wife 3000 miles away in London.
*
It's the first day of shooting; it's five o'clock in the fucking morning, and it's colder than a nun's arse on Boxing Day. Ewan can't feel his toes, even though he knows they're buried underneath two layers of socks and thermals and whatever else. He's trying to hold onto his cup of coffee –- which is utter shit -- through his gloves, and he can see Chris waving manically at Gus, his PA, and the best boy about something to do with the way the sun will be coming up. He's pointing and gesturing and -– he's hopping up and down. No one told Ewan that Chris Nolan was certifiable, but Ewan supposes he shouldn't be surprised.
This is the man who did Memento with Guy Pearce and willingly went into Batman Begins -- he's either a genius or fucking insane. "'s fuckin' freezing," Ewan says by way of greeting, glancing at Viggo out the corner of his eye.
It takes Ewan a whole minute to realise that Viggo's not wearing gloves, or thermals, or anything that could be considered protective gear. "Where the fuck is your coat?" Ewan demands, his coffee sloshing over the lip of his paper cup. "You want to catch your death?"
Viggo's smiles, lazy and true. His skin is shiny, and the moustache is gone. Ewan kind of misses the roguish air that the facial hair gave to Viggo. "You sound like Henry, you know."
"Well, Henry must be a smart man, whomever he is –- you should listen more." Ewan can hardly feel his lips. This had better be the best shot ever. This had better be the best indie film ever. There is no way he's getting his knob out in this weather. His balls are already trying to climb back up the way they came down.
"Henry's my son -– smartest man I know. And this -– this is fresh, unpolluted air," Viggo says, clapping his hands together and inhaling deeply. "This is real weather. Embrace it."
"Embrace what? What the fuck are you on about?"
"This is Canada –- this is nature in its purest form."
"This is me freezing my balls off in their purest form, is what is it," Ewan protests, his breaths coming in bright white bursts of condensed air. "You can't be serious about not wearing a coat."
Viggo nods his head. "I'm always serious," he says.
"You're going to catch your death."
"At least when I go, I'll know I was alive," Viggo announces proudly, before going off to talk with Chris and Gus. "Nothing's killed me yet."
Ewan just stares after Viggo.
He's fucking nuts.
*
The first day of shooting is unlike anything Ewan can remember experiencing before. It's long, and taxing, and cold as fuck. At one point, when they're filming Max and Sam –- Viggo and Ewan's characters –- on the beach hauling their fishing boat in, Ewan gets a splinter in his hand the size of a fucking cigarette.
It hurts like a bitch.
After Pam from make-up removes it, Viggo grabs Ewan's hand and kisses his palm. "It worked on my son every time," he says.
Ewan nods when Viggo drops his hand. "I have two girls, mate, I know exactly what you mean."
Chris rolls his eyes. "When you girls are finished flirting and cooing, can we get on with it?"
Both he and Viggo laugh; it's the perfect icebreaker, and Ewan just knows that it's going to be a brilliant film. After all, it's not every day that he gets to play the adopted brother of Viggo Mortensen, who also happens to be his love interest.
Yeah, it's a pretty fucked up movie.
When Jude had first heard, almost five months ago, he'd gone ballistic. "I wanted that role, you fucking tosser," he'd seethed, half in jest and half in seriousness.
They'd been in Ewan's dressing room at the theatre, and he'd been preparing for the Wednesday matinee, which normally went to his understudy, but occasionally, Ewan liked to mix things up a bit. "Didn't you listen to Chris Rock, darling?" he said, squinting in the mirror and wondering if he'd applied too much eyeliner. "You're over exposed. You need a holiday."
He'd just missed Jude's swing at the back of his head. "I'll show you over exposure," Jude'd said right before dropping his trousers.
"If you piss on me," Ewan'd warned, "I'll have it cut off."
"You wouldn't dare," Jude shot back. "It's too pretty."
"You're thinking of my knob now, you vain peacock."
And then Sienna'd come in -– and walked right back out.
Ewan had almost felt bad for her –- she had no idea what she'd got herself into, but better her than him.
*
They're hardly two weeks into a two-month shoot, but Ewan can see the differences in himself already. Quitting drinking to lose weight for Trainspotting was a process, which felt not unlike death; and going to his vocal coach for six weeks before Guys and Dolls was taxing. The months of chorography with Nick and Hayden in Australia wore him down, but they've only done seven days of filming for Diurnal Tide, and Ewan feels like he's five years younger than he was when he flew into Canada twelve days ago.
When he looks at himself in the mirror and studies the lines around his mouth and his eyes, he doesn't quite look his age. There's something about being around Viggo that makes Ewan feel younger that he really is, and he's not sure if this is a bad thing or not considering he did some pretty outlandish, not to mention criminal, shite in his youth.
This film just might be whatever he needs to take himself to that next level, wherever that is. Ewan hasn't felt so free since he went travelling with Charley, and there's something about this film that makes him feel alive. Viggo is almost contagious with his enthusiasm and his method acting. Ewan will gut the fish and wear the yellow rubbery dungarees, but he's not sleeping in the fucking boat.
The hours are long and painful, and his phone calls to his family are incredibly short and curt, but he always makes certain to ring before the girls go to bed. Chris works the schedule so that they're not on set between one and three, which Ewan is grateful for, and when he goes back to his rented house at night, he can feel the weariness in his bones.
He doesn't feel like singing or dancing or jumping all over with his displaced energy. It's like he's become Sam, spending his days trying to make a living as a fisherman, and at night he feels like he's done something honest for the first time in a long time.
*
The best thing about how hard they're working is that it gives Ewan plenty of time not to think about Hayden. Eighteen hour days on set leave very little time for e-mail and rambling messages on answer phones.
*
The first time Ewan opens the door to his trailer and finds Viggo looking at the photographs stuck up on the walls, he's not sure whether he should feel violated or not. He votes for 'not' though – Viggo's many things, but he's not going to run to The Sun because there are photographs of Jude or Hayden or Eve. Instead, Ewan lurks in the doorway, and Viggo doesn't even turn around when he says. "They're good photographs, you've got a keen eye for your subjects."
Ewan says, "thanks" because that's what his mother raised him to say.
Viggo just nods his head as he leaves, and Ewan doesn't know what to think, but after lunch there are three picture frames made from twigs and leaves and spray painted different colours.
There're also photographs of the coastline where they've been filming, and there's no note, but Ewan knows who they're from. The poetry is all Viggo.
Life sometimes bleeds away, like an overcast day stealing the color from the shoreline,
red, then blue fading until the world is grey pebbles and grey shale under a grey sky.
*
The thing about frustration, Ewan has decided, is that it can work for you -- or it can work against you. When Ewan was working on the Star Wars series, his frustration with George and the dialogue and the fucking blue screen were legendary. It wasn't any one thing, but all these things combined just made the first film so fucking hard to shoot that Ewan almost pulled all his hair out.
When the shoot was done, and he went home to Eve, he had no intention of going back. Ever. George could've sued him until all he had was his Pumas and some nappies for the girls, and he wouldn't have returned -– but Eve wouldn't let him quit. She said he had to finish what he'd started –- and they had a fantastic row about it, which ended with him crashing on Jude and Sadie's sofa, back when everyone was still on cordial terms.
And the next day, he'd gone home to his wife, and apologised because she was right and he was wrong, and his frustration had just gotten in the way until he couldn't see this opportunity for what it really was –- a chance to set himself up for life.
Star Wars was not the Royal Shakespeare Company, and it was never going to win him a BAFTA for Outstanding Acting in a Dramatic Role, but it was a chance to try something new. That was all that he had ever wanted for himself. It was all that Eve had wanted for him too. This was why he had married her in the first place –- because she refused to put up with his shit. When he had his diva moments, she would just roll her eyes and go back to playing with their daughters. When he worried that he was working too much and neglecting the girls, she would pack up his grotty rucksack from his Trainspotting days and drop it near the front door and tell him to get out and not come back until he'd done something great.
Ewan could be accused -– and convicted –- of many things in his life, but he loves his wife very much. It's not his fault if he still likes to look, though -- no one should be blamed for wondering 'what if.'
*
Viggo's not the best cook in the world, but he means well, and Ewan just laughs when Viggo invites him over and prepares fish. They spend every day, all day, with fish. They catch and gut, and then gut some more; Ewan has a new respect for his ancestors.
They've been filming for twenty-one days, and everybody reeks of fish all the time. The stench never goes away, and the girls in make-up have taken to doing everything outside because they don't want the trailer to smell of rot and decay. Ewan thinks when this is over, he is never going to eat another piece of fish again, but in the meantime, he can keep himself busy by looking at the canvases that Viggo's got outside.
It's still just as cold as it was on that first day, but Ewan's grown more accustomed to it. He won't go outside without a coat like some crazy bastards, but at least his extremities aren't turning blue with a regularity now. In the distance, he can hear his phone ringing, but he's already talked to the girls and Eve so whatever it is can wait.
When he comes back in the house, carrying a huge canvas of something he can't identify but wants on his wall anyway, Viggo's sitting on the sofa and finger painting on the coffee table. Correction: he's not painting on the table, he's painting the table, full stop.
"You had a phone call; I answered it." Viggo nods in the direction of Ewan's phone, and Ewan moves the canvas out of proximity of the working artist. It doesn't bother him that Viggo answered his phone; it doesn't occur to him that it should.
"Who was it?" he says more out of courtesy than anything else, before dropping down on the sofa next to Viggo.
"The screen said it was Hayden."
Ewan can feel that old tension in his bones, but he does his best to let it go. That was a long time ago.
"I knew someone like him a long time ago," Viggo says calmly, and Ewan narrows his eyes. He knows Viggo's telling him something important, and he's going to sort out what it is, except with Viggo one never knows if he means a long time ago as in years ago or as in last week.
There's nothing like a shot in the dark to wake up the entire camp. "A while ago, is it? Are we speaking rhetorically or literally?"
Viggo glances over at him, red paint smeared on his cheek and green in his hair. "Literally. If you can count five years as a while ago."
Ewan does his maths. "Lord of the Rings."
Viggo goes back to his painting. "It's easy to forget how young your twenties really are," he says easily, and Ewan's radar spins. He knew Orlando Bloom was gay. It takes him another minute to realise what Viggo is insinuating, and he bristles, but Viggo's not paying attention.
"Gay, straight, bisexual, they're all just labels, little brother. There's no need to pigeonhole people. You love who you love –- you shouldn't be punished for that."
This is the part where Viggo tells Ewan where the term 'pigeon-holing' comes from, and Ewan knows it. He could tell Viggo about Hayden and Eve and the girls and Jude, and Viggo wouldn't judge him. Instead he says "Hayden's a mate of mine; we made a few films together."
Viggo makes a non-committal noise. "Like I said, I've been there before."
*
The last night before wrapping up, the cast and crew throw a huge bonfire on the beach. Catering provides every kind of fish they can find in the waters off the coast, and at least six members of the crew get frostbite from going skinny-dipping. They'd invited Ewan along, but he'd declined gracefully all things considered. "I have to keep my tackle in working order for the missus, lads. Besides, it’s insured, and I don’t need my premiums to go up. Have to keep up my reputation for full frontal."
Instead, Ewan sits around the fire with Chris and Gus, while Viggo plays his guitar, and Ewan finds himself getting roped into singing out of nowhere.
A little Dylan, some Stones and Floyd, and one particularly vigorous Bowie number that has the make-up girls doing chorus-line kicks, later, Ewan finds himself sprawled next to Viggo as he smokes lazily and looks at the tide coming in and out. "So what are you going to do now, little brother?"
Viggo's habit of calling people little brother or little sister had grated on Ewan for a bit, until he'd realised it wasn't American weirdness as much as it was just Viggo weirdness. "I'm thinking maybe I need to take a trip. Another trip," Ewan says, drawing nonsense in the damp sand.
"Travelling's always good for the soul," Viggo agrees. "I'm going to go back to Venice and see my son."
"Your son's in Venice?" Ewan looks over at Viggo.
"The one in California, not the one in Italy."
Hayden's name is unspoken, but Ewan knows what Viggo's getting at. Hayden was in Venice, now he's back in Los Angeles. Ewan's been sending him Viggo's photographs. He's keeping the picture frames for himself; the canvas is for Eve.
"You should come with us," Ewan says. "On the trip. We're going to Africa."
Viggo just makes a 'hmm'ing noise, and Ewan sighs. He's dealt with some cryptic people, but Viggo is in a league all his own. "I love my wife you know," Ewan says suddenly, looking Viggo in the eye.
Viggo exhales slowly, his cigarette smoke floating into the darkness. "No one said you didn't."
"I know that -– I was just making it clear."
"You don't have to explain yourself, Ewan. Not to anybody, don't let them convince you otherwise."
Ewan narrows his eyes. "Is that what happened to you on Lord of the Rings? Somebody tried to convince you otherwise?"
Viggo just shrugs. "Something like that," he says, "but that's not the point of any of this."
"So what is the point, Master Viggo?" Ewan mocks. He can tell Viggo's trying to tell him something else that he thinks is important, but it would be nice if he could just say it.
"The point is that this, all of this," Viggo gestures towards the crew and the water and the sky and pretty much everything, "isn't who you are. This is your job, but your job doesn't define you. Don't forget where you came from before all this, or you won't know where you're going."
This is pretty profound, even for Viggo, and Viggo's gaze is unwavering. It's a bit spooky. It's also right. Ewan knows Viggo's right. At the end of the day, he's not an actor or a movie star or someone who just made really good film, he's just Ewan Gordon McGregor, who left Perthshire at sixteen. That was twenty lifetimes ago, and he can feel them all.
He really needs a fag. "So says the great Viggo."
Viggo laughs. "Amen, little brother."
-end-
Betas by
ethrosdemon and
serialkarma. It's like being back in business or summat, really.
Viggotry by
ethrosdemon.
Also, I sadly must point out the Diurnal Tide is not a real film starting Ewan and Viggo, since I already got yelled at for building up the hopes of one person.
Nugation: From the OED. n. Triviality, trifling; pointless or meaningless speech or action; an instance of this, a trifle.
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Star Wars RPS
Some Ewan/Hayden... some Viggo/Orli... some Jude/other. You know how that gets.
The second thing Ewan thinks when he meets Viggo Mortensen on the set of Diurnal Tide is that Viggo's mustache makes him look like a 70s porn star. It's not the most charitable thought Ewan's ever had, but he's currently being crushed by a man two stone heavier, and ten years older than him, who smells of stale cigarettes and sleeping outdoors for at least a week. Some people would be repulsed, but Ewan just laughs and hugs Viggo back.
One look at the grin on Viggo's face, and Ewan knows he made the right choice with this film. His agent, Bernie, wanted him to do some 'commercially viable' dreck, but Star Wars is enough 'commercially viable' crap for the rest of Ewan's life, so bollocks to that.
Ewan's going to make art with Viggo Mortensen, and the world isn't going to know what to do with itself when they're done with Chris Nolan's script and direction.
Yeah, this is exactly what Ewan needs right now: Nova Scotia's freezing winter, Viggo Mortensen's porn-star moustache, and the blessing of his wife 3000 miles away in London.
It's the first day of shooting; it's five o'clock in the fucking morning, and it's colder than a nun's arse on Boxing Day. Ewan can't feel his toes, even though he knows they're buried underneath two layers of socks and thermals and whatever else. He's trying to hold onto his cup of coffee –- which is utter shit -- through his gloves, and he can see Chris waving manically at Gus, his PA, and the best boy about something to do with the way the sun will be coming up. He's pointing and gesturing and -– he's hopping up and down. No one told Ewan that Chris Nolan was certifiable, but Ewan supposes he shouldn't be surprised.
This is the man who did Memento with Guy Pearce and willingly went into Batman Begins -- he's either a genius or fucking insane. "'s fuckin' freezing," Ewan says by way of greeting, glancing at Viggo out the corner of his eye.
It takes Ewan a whole minute to realise that Viggo's not wearing gloves, or thermals, or anything that could be considered protective gear. "Where the fuck is your coat?" Ewan demands, his coffee sloshing over the lip of his paper cup. "You want to catch your death?"
Viggo's smiles, lazy and true. His skin is shiny, and the moustache is gone. Ewan kind of misses the roguish air that the facial hair gave to Viggo. "You sound like Henry, you know."
"Well, Henry must be a smart man, whomever he is –- you should listen more." Ewan can hardly feel his lips. This had better be the best shot ever. This had better be the best indie film ever. There is no way he's getting his knob out in this weather. His balls are already trying to climb back up the way they came down.
"Henry's my son -– smartest man I know. And this -– this is fresh, unpolluted air," Viggo says, clapping his hands together and inhaling deeply. "This is real weather. Embrace it."
"Embrace what? What the fuck are you on about?"
"This is Canada –- this is nature in its purest form."
"This is me freezing my balls off in their purest form, is what is it," Ewan protests, his breaths coming in bright white bursts of condensed air. "You can't be serious about not wearing a coat."
Viggo nods his head. "I'm always serious," he says.
"You're going to catch your death."
"At least when I go, I'll know I was alive," Viggo announces proudly, before going off to talk with Chris and Gus. "Nothing's killed me yet."
Ewan just stares after Viggo.
He's fucking nuts.
The first day of shooting is unlike anything Ewan can remember experiencing before. It's long, and taxing, and cold as fuck. At one point, when they're filming Max and Sam –- Viggo and Ewan's characters –- on the beach hauling their fishing boat in, Ewan gets a splinter in his hand the size of a fucking cigarette.
It hurts like a bitch.
After Pam from make-up removes it, Viggo grabs Ewan's hand and kisses his palm. "It worked on my son every time," he says.
Ewan nods when Viggo drops his hand. "I have two girls, mate, I know exactly what you mean."
Chris rolls his eyes. "When you girls are finished flirting and cooing, can we get on with it?"
Both he and Viggo laugh; it's the perfect icebreaker, and Ewan just knows that it's going to be a brilliant film. After all, it's not every day that he gets to play the adopted brother of Viggo Mortensen, who also happens to be his love interest.
Yeah, it's a pretty fucked up movie.
When Jude had first heard, almost five months ago, he'd gone ballistic. "I wanted that role, you fucking tosser," he'd seethed, half in jest and half in seriousness.
They'd been in Ewan's dressing room at the theatre, and he'd been preparing for the Wednesday matinee, which normally went to his understudy, but occasionally, Ewan liked to mix things up a bit. "Didn't you listen to Chris Rock, darling?" he said, squinting in the mirror and wondering if he'd applied too much eyeliner. "You're over exposed. You need a holiday."
He'd just missed Jude's swing at the back of his head. "I'll show you over exposure," Jude'd said right before dropping his trousers.
"If you piss on me," Ewan'd warned, "I'll have it cut off."
"You wouldn't dare," Jude shot back. "It's too pretty."
"You're thinking of my knob now, you vain peacock."
And then Sienna'd come in -– and walked right back out.
Ewan had almost felt bad for her –- she had no idea what she'd got herself into, but better her than him.
They're hardly two weeks into a two-month shoot, but Ewan can see the differences in himself already. Quitting drinking to lose weight for Trainspotting was a process, which felt not unlike death; and going to his vocal coach for six weeks before Guys and Dolls was taxing. The months of chorography with Nick and Hayden in Australia wore him down, but they've only done seven days of filming for Diurnal Tide, and Ewan feels like he's five years younger than he was when he flew into Canada twelve days ago.
When he looks at himself in the mirror and studies the lines around his mouth and his eyes, he doesn't quite look his age. There's something about being around Viggo that makes Ewan feel younger that he really is, and he's not sure if this is a bad thing or not considering he did some pretty outlandish, not to mention criminal, shite in his youth.
This film just might be whatever he needs to take himself to that next level, wherever that is. Ewan hasn't felt so free since he went travelling with Charley, and there's something about this film that makes him feel alive. Viggo is almost contagious with his enthusiasm and his method acting. Ewan will gut the fish and wear the yellow rubbery dungarees, but he's not sleeping in the fucking boat.
The hours are long and painful, and his phone calls to his family are incredibly short and curt, but he always makes certain to ring before the girls go to bed. Chris works the schedule so that they're not on set between one and three, which Ewan is grateful for, and when he goes back to his rented house at night, he can feel the weariness in his bones.
He doesn't feel like singing or dancing or jumping all over with his displaced energy. It's like he's become Sam, spending his days trying to make a living as a fisherman, and at night he feels like he's done something honest for the first time in a long time.
The best thing about how hard they're working is that it gives Ewan plenty of time not to think about Hayden. Eighteen hour days on set leave very little time for e-mail and rambling messages on answer phones.
The first time Ewan opens the door to his trailer and finds Viggo looking at the photographs stuck up on the walls, he's not sure whether he should feel violated or not. He votes for 'not' though – Viggo's many things, but he's not going to run to The Sun because there are photographs of Jude or Hayden or Eve. Instead, Ewan lurks in the doorway, and Viggo doesn't even turn around when he says. "They're good photographs, you've got a keen eye for your subjects."
Ewan says, "thanks" because that's what his mother raised him to say.
Viggo just nods his head as he leaves, and Ewan doesn't know what to think, but after lunch there are three picture frames made from twigs and leaves and spray painted different colours.
There're also photographs of the coastline where they've been filming, and there's no note, but Ewan knows who they're from. The poetry is all Viggo.
Life sometimes bleeds away, like an overcast day stealing the color from the shoreline,
red, then blue fading until the world is grey pebbles and grey shale under a grey sky.
The thing about frustration, Ewan has decided, is that it can work for you -- or it can work against you. When Ewan was working on the Star Wars series, his frustration with George and the dialogue and the fucking blue screen were legendary. It wasn't any one thing, but all these things combined just made the first film so fucking hard to shoot that Ewan almost pulled all his hair out.
When the shoot was done, and he went home to Eve, he had no intention of going back. Ever. George could've sued him until all he had was his Pumas and some nappies for the girls, and he wouldn't have returned -– but Eve wouldn't let him quit. She said he had to finish what he'd started –- and they had a fantastic row about it, which ended with him crashing on Jude and Sadie's sofa, back when everyone was still on cordial terms.
And the next day, he'd gone home to his wife, and apologised because she was right and he was wrong, and his frustration had just gotten in the way until he couldn't see this opportunity for what it really was –- a chance to set himself up for life.
Star Wars was not the Royal Shakespeare Company, and it was never going to win him a BAFTA for Outstanding Acting in a Dramatic Role, but it was a chance to try something new. That was all that he had ever wanted for himself. It was all that Eve had wanted for him too. This was why he had married her in the first place –- because she refused to put up with his shit. When he had his diva moments, she would just roll her eyes and go back to playing with their daughters. When he worried that he was working too much and neglecting the girls, she would pack up his grotty rucksack from his Trainspotting days and drop it near the front door and tell him to get out and not come back until he'd done something great.
Ewan could be accused -– and convicted –- of many things in his life, but he loves his wife very much. It's not his fault if he still likes to look, though -- no one should be blamed for wondering 'what if.'
Viggo's not the best cook in the world, but he means well, and Ewan just laughs when Viggo invites him over and prepares fish. They spend every day, all day, with fish. They catch and gut, and then gut some more; Ewan has a new respect for his ancestors.
They've been filming for twenty-one days, and everybody reeks of fish all the time. The stench never goes away, and the girls in make-up have taken to doing everything outside because they don't want the trailer to smell of rot and decay. Ewan thinks when this is over, he is never going to eat another piece of fish again, but in the meantime, he can keep himself busy by looking at the canvases that Viggo's got outside.
It's still just as cold as it was on that first day, but Ewan's grown more accustomed to it. He won't go outside without a coat like some crazy bastards, but at least his extremities aren't turning blue with a regularity now. In the distance, he can hear his phone ringing, but he's already talked to the girls and Eve so whatever it is can wait.
When he comes back in the house, carrying a huge canvas of something he can't identify but wants on his wall anyway, Viggo's sitting on the sofa and finger painting on the coffee table. Correction: he's not painting on the table, he's painting the table, full stop.
"You had a phone call; I answered it." Viggo nods in the direction of Ewan's phone, and Ewan moves the canvas out of proximity of the working artist. It doesn't bother him that Viggo answered his phone; it doesn't occur to him that it should.
"Who was it?" he says more out of courtesy than anything else, before dropping down on the sofa next to Viggo.
"The screen said it was Hayden."
Ewan can feel that old tension in his bones, but he does his best to let it go. That was a long time ago.
"I knew someone like him a long time ago," Viggo says calmly, and Ewan narrows his eyes. He knows Viggo's telling him something important, and he's going to sort out what it is, except with Viggo one never knows if he means a long time ago as in years ago or as in last week.
There's nothing like a shot in the dark to wake up the entire camp. "A while ago, is it? Are we speaking rhetorically or literally?"
Viggo glances over at him, red paint smeared on his cheek and green in his hair. "Literally. If you can count five years as a while ago."
Ewan does his maths. "Lord of the Rings."
Viggo goes back to his painting. "It's easy to forget how young your twenties really are," he says easily, and Ewan's radar spins. He knew Orlando Bloom was gay. It takes him another minute to realise what Viggo is insinuating, and he bristles, but Viggo's not paying attention.
"Gay, straight, bisexual, they're all just labels, little brother. There's no need to pigeonhole people. You love who you love –- you shouldn't be punished for that."
This is the part where Viggo tells Ewan where the term 'pigeon-holing' comes from, and Ewan knows it. He could tell Viggo about Hayden and Eve and the girls and Jude, and Viggo wouldn't judge him. Instead he says "Hayden's a mate of mine; we made a few films together."
Viggo makes a non-committal noise. "Like I said, I've been there before."
The last night before wrapping up, the cast and crew throw a huge bonfire on the beach. Catering provides every kind of fish they can find in the waters off the coast, and at least six members of the crew get frostbite from going skinny-dipping. They'd invited Ewan along, but he'd declined gracefully all things considered. "I have to keep my tackle in working order for the missus, lads. Besides, it’s insured, and I don’t need my premiums to go up. Have to keep up my reputation for full frontal."
Instead, Ewan sits around the fire with Chris and Gus, while Viggo plays his guitar, and Ewan finds himself getting roped into singing out of nowhere.
A little Dylan, some Stones and Floyd, and one particularly vigorous Bowie number that has the make-up girls doing chorus-line kicks, later, Ewan finds himself sprawled next to Viggo as he smokes lazily and looks at the tide coming in and out. "So what are you going to do now, little brother?"
Viggo's habit of calling people little brother or little sister had grated on Ewan for a bit, until he'd realised it wasn't American weirdness as much as it was just Viggo weirdness. "I'm thinking maybe I need to take a trip. Another trip," Ewan says, drawing nonsense in the damp sand.
"Travelling's always good for the soul," Viggo agrees. "I'm going to go back to Venice and see my son."
"Your son's in Venice?" Ewan looks over at Viggo.
"The one in California, not the one in Italy."
Hayden's name is unspoken, but Ewan knows what Viggo's getting at. Hayden was in Venice, now he's back in Los Angeles. Ewan's been sending him Viggo's photographs. He's keeping the picture frames for himself; the canvas is for Eve.
"You should come with us," Ewan says. "On the trip. We're going to Africa."
Viggo just makes a 'hmm'ing noise, and Ewan sighs. He's dealt with some cryptic people, but Viggo is in a league all his own. "I love my wife you know," Ewan says suddenly, looking Viggo in the eye.
Viggo exhales slowly, his cigarette smoke floating into the darkness. "No one said you didn't."
"I know that -– I was just making it clear."
"You don't have to explain yourself, Ewan. Not to anybody, don't let them convince you otherwise."
Ewan narrows his eyes. "Is that what happened to you on Lord of the Rings? Somebody tried to convince you otherwise?"
Viggo just shrugs. "Something like that," he says, "but that's not the point of any of this."
"So what is the point, Master Viggo?" Ewan mocks. He can tell Viggo's trying to tell him something else that he thinks is important, but it would be nice if he could just say it.
"The point is that this, all of this," Viggo gestures towards the crew and the water and the sky and pretty much everything, "isn't who you are. This is your job, but your job doesn't define you. Don't forget where you came from before all this, or you won't know where you're going."
This is pretty profound, even for Viggo, and Viggo's gaze is unwavering. It's a bit spooky. It's also right. Ewan knows Viggo's right. At the end of the day, he's not an actor or a movie star or someone who just made really good film, he's just Ewan Gordon McGregor, who left Perthshire at sixteen. That was twenty lifetimes ago, and he can feel them all.
He really needs a fag. "So says the great Viggo."
Viggo laughs. "Amen, little brother."
-end-
Betas by
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Viggotry by
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Also, I sadly must point out the Diurnal Tide is not a real film starting Ewan and Viggo, since I already got yelled at for building up the hopes of one person.
Nugation: From the OED. n. Triviality, trifling; pointless or meaningless speech or action; an instance of this, a trifle.
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Date: 2005-06-15 10:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 07:32 pm (UTC)Crazy people. That's my diagnosis.
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Date: 2005-06-15 11:35 pm (UTC)Dude, for sure! Wasn't he on mickey mouse club?
And was Ewan's beverage supposed to change from coffee to tea in the first few minutes on set?
And what's with 'colder than a nun's arse on Boxing Day'? Is that a real curse? Who says that? I want to say that.
And how do we convince Chris Nolan to make a gay, adopted brothers, fisherman movie with Viggo and Ewan, anyway, because that would be insane.
Oh, yeah, great story, too! :D
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:34 pm (UTC)No, that's what happens when you change it at the last moment and don't catch all the references. Even Ewan's not that good.
And what's with 'colder than a nun's arse on Boxing Day'? Is that a real curse? Who says that? I want to say that.
Sadly, like much of this story, that too is fictional. But it's funny as hell and I couldn't help myself. My mind, it's warped.
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Date: 2005-06-15 11:42 pm (UTC)2) Lovely story. I've developed quite an addiction to Ewan/Hayden because of your brilliant stories and now must seek out more.
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-15 11:43 pm (UTC)I like this one best of the lot. Awesome.
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Date: 2005-06-16 03:09 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2005-06-15 11:48 pm (UTC)I feel like I should mention that half way through this story I stopped and ran to IMDB to look up Diurnal Tide because Ewan, Viggo, and Chris Nolan all in one movie seemed too good to be true. It was, apparently. :D
Very lovely story :)
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Date: 2005-06-16 01:05 am (UTC)Oh, you too?
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From:no subject
Date: 2005-06-15 11:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 07:38 pm (UTC)My job here is done.
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Date: 2005-06-16 12:00 am (UTC):D
I must admit, I sniffed a bit at this:
Instead he says "Hayden's a mate of mine; we made a few films together."
Viggo makes a non-committal noise. "Like I said, I've been there before."
You really got me here.
Also, thanks for the plug!
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 12:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 07:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 12:05 am (UTC)Love it, love the whole series and Viggo being wierd just makes me love it even more ;)
And that film needs to get made *nods* with or without the fish ;P
colder than a nun's arse on Boxing Day *lmao*
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 12:31 am (UTC)Yeah, it was a pretty fucked up movie.
...
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 12:36 am (UTC)your best fic evar omgThe Man Who Stole the World. And I'm glad you did, it turned out kind of nice, with that connection.Beautiful. Fabulous. Fabutiful.
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 01:54 am (UTC)Er, and I sincerely apologize for this, but it's a wicked pet peeve of mine — Ewan had almost felt badly for her... Bad, not badly. ::hides::
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 02:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 07:44 pm (UTC)I absolutely love how well you write these people, it's amazing. I also love how it's all so subtle. It's pairings and love and all that but it's not in your face porn(which, of course, is lovely. But we fangirls need our breaks). So bravo to you.
You are very kind, thank you :)
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Date: 2005-06-16 02:51 am (UTC)(I'm kinda sad that you and K have put the final nail in the coffin of Viggo and Orli, though, because I seem to have experienced a revival of my rips love in the past week or so. Ah, nostalgia.)
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:48 pm (UTC)It's all K, man.
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Date: 2005-06-16 04:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 07:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 05:05 am (UTC)): now all I have to do is sit around and pray that there really will be a diurnal tide.
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:49 pm (UTC)Me too! :D
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Date: 2005-06-16 06:38 am (UTC)Also, Ryan Gosling singing and playing guitar = Lana!splosion.
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Date: 2005-06-17 07:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 09:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 07:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 10:26 am (UTC)I know Diurnal Tide isn't a film. It *really* should be. Ewan in fishing waders. Yum.
and one particularly vigorous Bowie number that has the make-up girls doing chorus-line kicks - Hah! I can see this!
*smooches*
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Date: 2005-06-17 08:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 12:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 08:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 04:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-17 08:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 09:49 pm (UTC)the adopted brother of Viggo Mortensen, who also happens to be his love interest.
Hahaha, this is like the OC but better. *loves*
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Date: 2005-06-17 08:01 pm (UTC)Hahaha, this is like the OC but better. *loves*
I couldn't help myself. :D
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Date: 2005-06-16 09:53 pm (UTC)Very beautifully written fic... I liked it a lot :)
Also thanks for the Ryan Gosling song, it's lovely!
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Date: 2005-06-17 08:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-16 11:14 pm (UTC)And Diurnal Tide sounds like the best movie EVAH! Too bad that it doesn't exist. :(
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Date: 2005-06-17 08:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-06-24 08:27 am (UTC)The second thing Ewan thinks when he meets Viggo Mortensen on the set of Diurnal Tide is that Viggo's mustache makes him look like a 70s porn star.
Heh. Now I want to know what his first thought was.
"I knew someone like him a long time ago," Viggo says calmly, and Ewan narrows his eyes. He knows Viggo's telling him something important, and he's going to sort out what it is, except with Viggo one never knows if he means a long time ago as in years ago or as in last week.
I love the way you've made this story about more than just Ewan and Hayden. It's a great contrast to their story, but it also makes it so much more real. Fantastic details.