No, the party is not over...

[hackthis_archive]

There’s been a lot of mention of Ryan Adams over the last several days, quite possibly because I pimp him incessantly. If you don’t know who Ryan is ::coughphilistinecough:: then you know, get thee here post haste. In the meanwhile, even though I’ve written myself into a stupor, I’ve got one last card up my sleeve.

Multi-Fandom drabble for the birthday girls: bonibaru and happyminion ;)

Come Pick Me Up




“You must be freezing,” Lex called from the sliding doors. His voice broke through the winter quiet and seemed to bounce off the cement walls that surrounded the balcony. Clark blinked and a small smile grazed his lips.

He’d heard Lex coming. For once.

“I’ll get over it,” he said after several seconds. After all, Clark hadn’t actually given it much thought. Yes, he was outside without a coat, and yes, it was snowing, but it was so beautiful. Clark always thought the first snow of the year was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He’d had the same thought for the last twenty-odd years that he’d been on Earth.

At least there were a few things that never changed.

“Not if you die from hypothermia first.” Lex’s voice was insistent behind him, and Clark turned from the railing. He gazed at Lex, who was standing in an open doorway, letting errant snowflakes blow into the penthouse behind him.

“Lex. Alien.” His eyes traveled up the lithe form that was only wrapped in pajama bottoms and a flannel bathrobe. “You on the other hand, are not, do you want to catch cold?” Clark’s eye roved from head to toe and back again at least twice. Lex and snow, it really couldn’t get much better. Unless Lex suddenly stripped or something, but it might be a bit cold for that.

“I don’t get sick, Clark, but you on the other hand... Shut up and humor me.” Lex added the last part with finality, as though getting sick and Kryptonite were something he could stave off with enough bravado. And yet, Clark couldn’t help but notice the way Lex flinched when several pieces of snow landed on his bare chest. He nodded accordingly and watched as Lex retreated back into the apartment and walked off.

Turning back around to enjoy the blanket of quiet white that continued to fall over Metropolis, he spoke into the silence. “I always do.”

+++

The snow fell fast around them as Clark tried to tug the shirt over his head. For some reason he kept trying to put his head through the sleeves. “How long have you had this?” Clark asked eying Lex through the neck hole of the shirt.

“A few years now.” Lex grinned at Clark’s predicament before reaching up and pulling the shirt off so Clark could try again. His fingers worked nimbly despite the leather gloves that encased them.

Reaching out and plucking the shirt from Lex’s fingers, Clark turned the shirt around so that the tags would be in the back this time. “I can barely read it,” he chuckled, rucking up the faded Princeton shirt so that he could put his head through it first.

“You can barely read at all, Mr. Reporter,” Lex corrected, crossing his arms and leaning back against the railing to watch Clark’s progress. He reached up to brush several flakes off his head, without taking his eyes off Clark.

“Hey, I’m not the one who went to Princeton, smart ass.” Clark struggled for several seconds before his head popped out the neck hole, his arms however, still weren't quite with the program. He’d never had this much trouble getting dressed before.

“What can I say,” Lex shrugged as Clark finally managed to pull the shirt down and over the thin white undershirt he’d been wearing. “I like the cold weather.”

“Is it really cold in New Jersey?” Clark inquired, rearranging the sweatshirt so that it fit better and didn’t restrict his arm movement so much.

“It’s a lot of things in New Jersey,” Lex corrected.

The snow continued to fall as they stood side by side on the balcony and watched. Not once did Lex complain about the snow falling on his uncovered head. Not once did Clark mention Lex’s sartorial combination of silk pajama bottoms, wool coat and worn Adidas sneakers.

+++

“It’s really soft,” Clark spoke after several seconds or minutes or perhaps days. He wasn’t really that sure. His arms were folded on the balcony railing, and he was resting his chin on top of his hands. The snow was still falling, and Lex was next to him. Nothing else mattered much. He leaned over, hunching slightly, and rested his head on Lex’s shoulder.

“Hmmm,” Lex’s voice rumbled.

“This sweatshirt. It’s been washed a lot,” Clark offered by way of explaination. Yes, it was a rather random statement, but it seemed to make sense to him.

In a distinctly Clark Kent sort of way.

“I’ve never thought of you as a sweatshirt kind of guy,” he continued, as though that were the missing link in his thought process.

Clark felt rather than heard Lex’s amusement. “Well, I never thought of myself as an alien kind of guy, either, so I guess we’re even.”

Clark pulled away and stood up, leaning forward a bit to catch Lex’s eye. The line of his mouth was straight, but his eyes were bright and there were snowflakes in his eyelashes. “It’s my favorite shirt,” Lex said, letting Clark's intense study wash over him.

“I’ll take good care of it.” Clark had meant to go for mocking, but his voice sounded rather solemn to his own ears. Almost funereal, or maybe that was the weather. It was only a sweatshirt, but it was Lex’s.

“No,” Lex’s mouth pulled into a small smile and he looked – wistful. “I want you to have it, Clark.”

“Are you sure?”

“Always.”

-finis-

~ fandom break ~







‘I’ll only break your heart’ wasn’t what the letter had said.

Malfoy would never be that obvious.

Harry knows that now as he knew it then, and if he *ever* doubted he has a yellowing piece of parchment with a green seal to remind him of this.

Malfoy always had the most flowery writing. Loops and lines and a ‘y’ that went back and forth through his surname like a sword through a basilisk.

+++

'You will spend the rest of your life thinking of me' isn’t what the letter said either.

Malfoy never would’ve claimed to work that hard for Harry’s attention. No, Malfoy certainly never tried for that. Or he never really needed to, not when Harry already watched him like a hawk.

Now Harry has no one to watch. He stays up late into night, lying in a bed that he can’t sleep in, waiting for someone who will never arrive.

+++

Nowhere in the letter did it say:

Maybe I don’t love you, but maybe I do.

They never talked about love. They did, on occasion, get drunk.

+++

What the letter had said was:

You don’t have to save me.

What the letter had said was:

I have obligations to people other than you.

What the letter had meant was:

Maybe things could have been different.

+++

What the letter had said was that he didn’t care.

What the letter had said was that Malfoy was always going to be himself. He was never going to leave his family and his friends and the only life he had ever known just for Harry Bloody Potter.

It didn’t matter.

Harry had known that all the same. It wasn’t about what the letter had said: it was always about the things that Harry wished he would say and never did.

-finis-


Note#1: I shamelessly paraphrased a line from the Manic Street Preachers 'A Design for Life.' I admit it. It's a good song you know.

Note: Lyrics can be found here.

Comments

[kylandra.livejournal.com]

Lovely, as always.

I especially like the touches, Lex and his worn sweater, and the letter that Harry keeps that never says what he wishes it would.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

I especially like the touches, Lex and his worn sweater, and the letter that Harry keeps that never says what he wishes it would.

You know when I wrote the H/D piece I had no idea what I was trying to do with it, or what it was supposed to say, but I think you might've hit what i was after better than me: the way people re-read stuff trying to find what's not there. Oh, that's so sad. I've depressed myself.

[r1cepudding.livejournal.com]

I’ll take good care of it.” Clark had meant to go for mocking, but his voice sounded rather solemn to his own ears. Almost funereal, or maybe that was the weather. It was only a sweatshirt, but it was Lex’s.

“No,” Lex’s mouth pulled into a small smile and he looked – wistful. “I want you to have it, Clark.”

“Are you sure?”

“Always.”

*shivers* Mmm. The theme of snow really permeated this story. It's soft, quiet and beautiful, but there's something melancholy about it also. I adore your pieces like this, which just capture a moment and a feeling so perfectly. Lovely.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

*shivers* Mmm. The theme of snow really permeated this story. It's soft, quiet and beautiful, but there's something melancholy about it also. I adore your pieces like this, which just capture a moment and a feeling so perfectly. Lovely.

Yes, that's me, all about the moment. Heaven forbid I ever try and create a plot. ;) Seriously though, I'm glad you liked this. :)

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

wah, you and your circles and your heartbreaking little things and the back and worth and the inching forward only to find a dead end, and spin around and drop.
it used to be you would have a really strong narrative voice and you -told- us things about the characters and how they felt.
and i really like how you're beginning to mix that up with little details and just -thoughts- that you put in their head, and it's like, you don't have to say it as much, because there's this mix of showing and explaining, kinda.
"this is how it is, and this is why", and also just -things-, events, objects, that somehow manage to symbolize and make it come alive, give motion to the emotion.

it's neat~:)

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

it used to be you would have a really strong narrative voice and you -told- us things about the characters and how they felt.
and i really like how you're beginning to mix that up with little details and just -thoughts- that you put in their head, and it's like, you don't have to say it as much, because there's this mix of showing and explaining, kinda.

I'm not sure if my style has changed as much as I've started to run out of things to say. The boys and I are kind of at an blockage in terms of inspiration. I've killed them both off several times, they've gotten together, broken up, fought, and gone off to war. I think we're all a bit tired of each other.

[yourpoison.livejournal.com]

*nods*
yah, i can see what you mean. personally, i'm always writing the fic where i actually -say- anything in the future. mostly, i just have emotion and imagery and like, angst and stuff. that is when i don't just have snarky!smut ^^;
but you've always -said- things from the very beginning, instead of just you know, playing around without any particular destination, and i can definitely see how that could tire you.
i mean, in the end, there's definitely a limited number of things to say... well, not -really-, because people in general are multifaceted, but perhaps about characters you've defined a lot of.
that's why writers don't usually recycle characters all that much beyond just one book or three, which is y'know, usually equivalent to two or three main "points" or things to say, or thereabouts. so i'd say you've done good ^^

i mean, it's just that you've done it with short-fic rather than epics like say, aja & `love under will'.
i can definitely see how it'd get tedious, almost, unless you were spending time expanding on just one story, to keep having to come up with new angles. hmmm. i guess that's the problem with knowing what you do and don't have in you to say. personally, i have only the vaguest idea of what i have in me to say, so i can just blithely go on writing or not writing as the muse strikes me -.-

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

i mean, it's just that you've done it with short-fic rather than epics like say, aja & `love under will'.
i can definitely see how it'd get tedious, almost, unless you were spending time expanding on just one story, to keep having to come up with new angles. hmmm. i guess that's the problem with knowing what you do and don't have in you to say. personally, i have only the vaguest idea of what i have in me to say, so i can just blithely go on writing or not writing as the muse strikes me -.-

I've never read Aja's 'Love Under Will' so I can't comment on her work. It's nothing personal. I happened to really enjoy 'Atrophy' but I'm just not interested in works that have no end in sight. If i want an epic then I'll buy a book, which is also why I have no interest in writing anything that goes on forever either. Why use 15 words when three will do, and why spend ten chapters talking about one thing happening? I don't need lots of flowerly language to interest me. i simply prefer other methods of delivery. With regards to running out of things to say, I doubt that that day will ever come for me, but I may simply may not have anything else to say regarding these characters. Who knows? Certainly not me, I just take it as it comes.

[anothersuperboy.livejournal.com]

Fabulous! *worships*

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked it :)

[corinna-5.livejournal.com]

"Come Pick Me Up" is such a fabulous song, and these stories do it justice -- although I think the Smallville one may be too happy for it! I am pretty much over Ryan Adams (please don't hit me!), but I will always love having heard him sing that with just his guitar and harmonica at a Bloodshot Records showcase in, I think, 2000.

Have you heard Caitlin Cary's new album? Called While You Weren't Looking. Just sexy and lovely and AMAZING. And Adams has co-author credit on one or two of the songs, for the completists in the house.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

"Come Pick Me Up" is such a fabulous song, and these stories do it justice -- although I think the Smallville one may be too happy for it! I am pretty much over Ryan Adams (please don't hit me!), but I will always love having heard him sing that with just his guitar and harmonica at a Bloodshot Records showcase in, I think, 2000.

Have you heard Caitlin Cary's new album? Called While You Weren't Looking. Just sexy and lovely and AMAZING. And Adams has co-author credit on one or two of the songs, for the completists in the house.

I've tested out Caitlin Cary's new album, and it did nothing for me. I think she did her best work singing with Ryan for Whiskeytown. Now Ryan on the other hand, I think he has his ups and downs. 'Heartbreaker' is just incredibly raw and so well done. I think 'Gold' is a beautifully polished piece of work. I'm not that keen on 'Demolition', but I think he's still got a lot of potential left in him and I look forward to seeing what else he does.

With regards to 'Come Pick Me Up', that will always be one of the most beautiful songs ever, and in all the times I've heard it live it's never failed to break *my* heart. But I think it can be hopeful as well as depressing which is what I was trying for here.

[happyminion.livejournal.com]

Sweatshirt.

*sigh*

My heart is just a'thump-a'thump.

Beautifully, and the image of Clark with snowflakes catching on his lashes and his chin resting on his hands is incredibly vivid.

Thanks, baby girl.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Sweatshirt.

*sigh*

My heart is just a'thump-a'thump.

Beautifully, and the image of Clark with snowflakes catching on his lashes and his chin resting on his hands is incredibly vivid.

Thanks, baby girl.

I'm sorry the big day has turned out so lop-sided. I swear I didn't mean to exacerbate anything, and I hope this evening turns out way better than this morning.

Re:

[happyminion.livejournal.com]

I am listening to...that boy's version of the song, now.

I'm still undecided. *g*

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

I am listening to...that boy's version of the song, now.

I'm still undecided. *g*

::waits waits with baited breath::

and the jury says? it's ryan, you have to give him a shot, he does all these beautiful songs like: Touch, Feel, Lose; Nobody Girl; The Rescue Blues; Enemy Fire; Come Pick Me Up; Why Do They Leave; Amy; Goodnight, Hollywood Blvd; plus, you know, there's his Whiskeytown work.

Re:

[happyminion.livejournal.com]

Not that you're a fan or anything.

*snorf*

Re:

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Not that you're a fan or anything.

*snorf*

me? biased? what? ::elbows lex:: no, it is not the same when there's money involved. yes, no, what bribes? i never takes bribes -- unless there's nudity involved -- and you can put that on the record.

[ingridmatthews.livejournal.com]

Ahhhh. That takes away some of my winter angst right there. Lovely!

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Ahhhh. That takes away some of my winter angst right there. Lovely!

I'm glad you liked it :)

[barely-bean.livejournal.com]

For some reason the idea of Lex and New Jersey, it just really makes me chuckle. Love it, love it like a warm worn sweatshirt on a winter's night.

Also, the Harry Potter...*sniff*...damn you, no one makes me fall for Draco the way you do.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

For some reason the idea of Lex and New Jersey, it just really makes me chuckle. Love it, love it like a warm worn sweatshirt on a winter's night.

Also, the Harry Potter...*sniff*...damn you, no one makes me fall for Draco the way you do.

I don't know where the idea of Lex in New Jersy came from, but suddenly it just won't go away. And as for the HP, well, you know, it's yet another fine dirty habit that insures i'm going to *the special hell*.

[boniblithe.livejournal.com]

I don't know where the idea of Lex in New Jersy came from, but suddenly it just won't go away.

Clearly, it's because I am in New Jersey, and Lex should be here with me :-D

[silviakundera.livejournal.com]

Harry had known that all the same. It wasn’t about what the letter had said: it was always about the things that Harry wished he would say and never did.

OH. STOP. FUCK I HAVE GOOSEBUMPS. STOP. AND I AM SO BROKEN. STOP. WILL GET BACK TO YOU. STOP.


oh god, this story

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Harry had known that all the same. It wasn’t about what the letter had said: it was always about the things that Harry wished he would say and never did.

OH. STOP. FUCK I HAVE GOOSEBUMPS. STOP. AND I AM SO BROKEN. STOP. WILL GET BACK TO YOU. STOP.


oh god, this story

I broke you? No. Way. Result! What? Do you know how much I envy your writing? Dude, that you liked this? I must go dance in the aisles.

[samenashi.livejournal.com]

Now Harry has no one to watch. He stays up late into night, lying in a bed that he can’t sleep in, waiting for someone who will never arrive.

Oh, both of them lovely as always.

[someidiothasice.livejournal.com]

um.

your icon.

*stares and drools*

just. damn.

Re:

[samenashi.livejournal.com]

:D They're so in love, man. So Hot. <333

[someidiothasice.livejournal.com]

i'm like, sitting here trying to bite it.

*licks the screen*

ow. and why won't my brain let me LET GO of harry and draco for five seconds, just long enough for me to sit here and go "they really don't look like either of them... really..."

*wails*

yes. quite hot.

Re:

[samenashi.livejournal.com]

It's hypnotizing, isn't it?

*grin*

HarryandDracoaresodeeplyandutterlyinlove.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

Oh, both of them lovely as always.

Thank you.

[delfeus.livejournal.com]

You made me weep. You're evil.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

You made me weep. You're evil.

Well, yes, I am evil. What, you didn't see the sign on the door? -->

'Cruel and Evil, Incorporated'

[delfeus.livejournal.com]

HA HA HA! :D

[someidiothasice.livejournal.com]

okay, so. ow. h/d is just beautiful. harry reading, rereading and going over it again, desperately dissecting the little peices like the loop in his y, and trying so hard to read between the lines that he's got a million other meanings he thinks draco might be trying to say...

*weeps*

so tormented, and alive and painfully real, because draco would never leave everything behind for harry. ow.

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

okay, so. ow. h/d is just beautiful. harry reading, rereading and going over it again, desperately dissecting the little peices like the loop in his y, and trying so hard to read between the lines that he's got a million other meanings he thinks draco might be trying to say...

*weeps*

so tormented, and alive and painfully real, because draco would never leave everything behind for harry. ow.

I'm glad you enjoyed this - I think. :)

Re:

[someidiothasice.livejournal.com]

oh, definitely. your writing's just so poignant, lyrical and stuff. and no, i'm not about to start waxing poetic about your writing, but. yes, beautiful.

okay, /fangirl. am done now ;-)