Olympics r srs bzness.

[hackthis_archive]

It's not really possible to explain exactly how whipped I have been by the Olympics, but I will try:

a) Yesterday, I wrote French swimmer slash, because well, hotass.

b) While discussing said hotass, oconel produced this picture of Amaury Leveaux to which my entire thought was Wow. The French are more than welcome to talk smack when they look like this. And also? Someone needs to lick his back during sex. And if it can't be me, then he needs a man so I can write about this. Find him a man and I will write this story. Alain Bernard is 6'5. Just a thought.

c) NBC is playing along. Identify the male swimmer by his stomach. I shit you not.

c) In the morning I watch Jon and Stephen, it has pretty much always been this way. This week I have been channel surfing away from Jon and Stephen with alarming regularity because OMG! What if I miss swimming hotass? This aberration cannot be understated.

d) Last night, during the men's heats, the NBC commentators said, "[Their] coaches say that Ryan Lochte is the best thing to ever happen to Michael Phelps." And then they went on to talk about how Ryan helps Michael be more relaxed and I was like yeah, that's a sex shoutie right there.

In fact, this made my gaydar ping so hard I was momentarily deaf, but I said, No! I have written my Olympics slash. And then sparky77 sent me The World According to Lochte which has bling grills! Skateboarding! Drawing rain falling upwards! Dressing like John Travolta! and I realized I can not fight this.

Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte are totally having sex. And getting stoned. Probably in that order too.

ETA: And because nobody is more awesome than rowers: let's spread the homoeroticism around, hey?

ETA #2: I think Keith Olbermann said it best, "There are only two times of day: when Michael Phelps is preparing to race, and when Michael Phelps is racing."

Comments

[mamadeb.livejournal.com]

You want true homoeroticism?

The Men's Synchronized Diving teams.

1. The Americans. Who are in their twenties, have trained together for over ten years, finish each other's sentences, look at each other adorably before diving, and call each other "baby."

2. The Canadians. Which. Get this one. One of them is the best diver in Canada - famous there, in fact. What he says, goes. And what did he say? "I want my best friend of 14 years, who does not dive on my level but is pure Cuban gorgeousness, to be my partner. Or I do not dive." And, so it happens. And so, no medals for him. But he dives next to pure Cuban gorgeousness. :)

3. The Russians - tough old Russian guy. Pretty teen age Russian boy.


And, you know. Scantily clad men diving in unison, trying to look like one diver from the side.

*fans self*

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

1. I turned on synchro the minute the Americans got on the board and before I heard the commentators, before I even knew the event, I took one look at the closest diver and I said, oh, he's very gay. Hearing him count just sort of proved it. Yes, every motion was rather femme, so when I heard that their families were best friends and that they were sharing the same apartment I was like, dude, totally 21st century gay acceptance hooray.

2. I heard about that! And I totally thought the same thing. You want me, I want my man, you fix it.

3. I saw that and was just like, uhhhhh, okay y'all.

[thexpuzzler.livejournal.com]

Could sports be any gayer?
One reason to love the Olympics. Cultural, religious, sexual acceptance.
And the condoms to prove it.
(I don't wanna be the people who clean up the trash from the rooms. Just sayin'.)

[just-katarin.livejournal.com]

THE RUSSIANS KISSED ON THE MOUTH! you can only barely see it, but there was mouth kissing!