idealists are the cruelest monsters of them all.

It is International Left Handers Day. Represent lefties! Both Marilyn Monroe and Napoleon were lefties. Hell, so is Brangelina. But we can't have everything.

Speaking of representing, the French may have talked a lot of 4X100 smack, but at no point would I begrudge them anything if they continue to show their swimmers stripping each other in front of God and Country. Liberte! Egalite! Nudite! (Yes, this photo is safe for work, you just won't feel like it is).

I'm sure the conversation went something like this:

Lefert: You are wet, here let me help you
Teammate: Yes, I'm wet. I just swam a relay.
Lefert: Yes, but you are wet. You need to get undressed.
Teammate: In front of all these people?
Lefert: Here, the heat from my gaze will keep you warm
Teammate: Wait, too warm! Too warm!
Lefert: We can haz sex nao?
Teammate: Yes. No. Yes. I am so fucking tired. I just swam a relay
Lefert: Which is why you should get naked. Now.
Teammate: Well, if you insist.

Apparently it takes 30 minutes to put the LZR suit on, so I suppose any shortcuts are more than welcome. AND. 10 brownie points to whomever can tell me the name of the man being stripped. AND. I will write you post relay comfort porn in the showers. You know, if that's your thing.


ETA: If you are interested in Generation Kill, but do not currently posess the means of seeing it, it might behoove you to join the generation_kill community where they might be able to assist you. (Yes, I use words like behoove. What?)

I have been completely taken over by the Olympics and Generation Kill. No, seriously. My entire schedule revolves around 'Olympics! I must haz them now!' and then they're airing everything I want to see when I'm supposed to be asleep and this would be awesome if I were kept woman (I'm looking at you, Ryan Gosling), but since I have rent to pay, err, not so good. But I can't help myself! Rowing! Swimming! Synchronized diving in Speedo! Gymnastics! Archery! Equestrian! More rowing! I need an icon that says, ODing on the Olympics.

And how do I know the Olympics have eaten my head? Well, I'm currently desperate to rewatch the first five episodes of my current hotass fling, Generation Kill, but to do that I have to stop watching the Olympics for longer than 30 minutes and that just doesn't seem possible. What if I miss some perfectly obscure sport that I would never ever watch otherwise? Water polo, I'm looking at you. Actually, just watching water polo makes me crazy tired. Riflery, I don't even know. When else would I watch weightlifting?

Now, Generation Kill, on the other hand, well, I can take the hint people, I have bought the book (used)*, so you can stop cutting and pasting whole sections to press the case for your favorite pairing. I agree, Rudy & Pappy are the new baby OTP, and yes, there is a strong case for Brad/Ray, but I can't see them doing anything sexual, I think they are the married couple that are together for the companionship.

*Unfortunately it turns out my used copy is an original printing which means no 2007 afterword about where they are now, which will thusly require about 30 minutes at Borders once I am done with this version of the book.

p.p.s Did y'all know that Nate wrote a book? I did not know this. Love Nate. Okay, correction, love Stark Sands as Nate. I know where my real loyalties lie. I understand some people saying Marine RPS? You've totally done it now, but I very clearly understand that my fascination with GK has to do with the actors playing real people and their characterizations there of, not the people themselves. I have nothing but the utmost respect for the real men of the First Recon. So, my stories? ALL FICTION (except for those bits that just happen to be true). It's like when I write George. I do not know George, I do not pretend to know a damn thing about George (except all the links that I'm sent), but my fascination is with the characterization I've made of him. So, the real Nate Fick has had a society wedding and various other things, the Nate Fick in my head will retire one day and get a house on the water in Hermosa Beach so Brad can go racing his motorcycles all the time.

And now, if you'll excuse me I am off to write in my fake world. Or possibly wonder how to get Michael Phelps and his size 17 feet into some fictional universe that I like. Hey man, you've gotta know your line.

Also, is the entire Brazilian volleyball team sleeping together? Inquiring minds think so.

It took me like six or seven tries to make this happen. At one point I was just going to toss in the towel, and then lo, the voices spoke to me.

Don't ever say I never gave you anything.


The Dark Knight
Bruce Wayne/Harvey Dent,
Rated NC-17

Now the Old King is Dead, Long Live the King

( It's not a smile, it's a predatory declaration of intent. )

I've got new fandoms to try out and rusty porn kinks to work through. Bear with me here.


Generation Kill
Brad Colbert/Nate Fick
Rated GH for Going to Hell
Please note that this is all fiction all the time. No harm or offense intended.

I Donated Myself to the Mexican Army

( Do I need to check you for pussy, sir? )

So, the other day I had this poll where I asked if you lot would rather see Bruce/Harvey Dark Knight porn or Nate/Brad Generation Kill porn. I knew beforehand what the majority were probably going to say, but I was shocked, shocked that more of you aren't on the Generation Kill train. And I thought to myself, "Self, what we really need here is an example of The Pretty to get the fanpeople in line, because there are boys, sweaty, foul-mouthed boys living together in the desert and nobody seems to care! And it's written by David Simon!"

So, for the unitiated let me break it down. Generation Kill is a seven-part HBO miniseries about a Marine Recon division in Iraq at the beginning of the invasion, based on a book by Evan Wright. Real reople, real shit, maybe marginally tweaked for TV. See. That's the basics.

( Generation Kill: This battalion is trained to swim or parachute behind enemy lines, not to drive into attacks in Humvees. Their motto is 'Swift Silent Deadly' Also? Massive Pic Spam. SO not dial-up friendly. )

1. Morgan Freeman was in a serious car accident last night. I'm hoping it turns out okay, but um, is the Batman project cursed? Seriously, y'all?

2. hackthis: Shiloh Jolie Pitt looks like a mini Katee Sackhoff.
serialkarma: oooh, maybe Katee's the real mother!
hackthis: That's just Cylon propaganda you're spouting now. OMG! Shiloh is the missing Cylon!
serialkarma: Well, that would totally explain a LOT.

3. Mad Men people, if you've ever asked yourself What Would Don Draper Do?, well now you know. Yes, I made an LJ feed.

4. Even Christian Bale thinks Bruce needs to get it on. Bruce/Harvey pron for the motherfucking win.

5. ( Letters to Mad Men, Burn Notice and Generation Kill. Cut for spoilers. )

Dear Mike Rowe:

Your hot never wanes. This is most impressive when you are shrieking about the sharks.

<3
Me

a) I posted what may be my favorite Iron Man story yesterday, Spies > Superheroes (Or Not), which is a Burn Notice/Iron Man/Alias x-over. Yes, you read that right. Embrace the wonder that is Michael Westen/Tony Stark (and Sark). Writing that story was pure love. And hotass.

b) Where are my Generation Kill people at? Come talk to me! I mean, seriously, David Simon, how do you do this shit? I know it's based off of the book, but talk about keeping it real! Holy cow. I mean I couldn't tell if you I liked it, but I damn well plan to keep watching it if only for Rudy. Who doesn't want to sleep with him? Oh, and they have a Colbert! Gayest, straight show ever. (spoilers in comments)

c) It is Batman times nao?

Like some of my battle-scarred fellows, I've been around fandom for a few years now. Not as many as some, not as few as others, but long enough to have respectable amount of fandom activity under my belt.

I'm already at the point where I find a good amount of the contents of any major bookstore lacking in character development, plot and good old-fashioned entertainment because fandom has spoiled me. (Thanks guys!) And yet, every now and then a story comes across my path that so far surpasses my (rather high) expectations of what fandom writers can do that I'm just sort of left with my jaw hanging.

I can think of three, maybe four, times in my fandom experience where I've read a story and been so floored, so jealous, so filled with all consuming awe that I really consider tossing the towel in and going off to study turtles in the Galapagos like I should've years ago.

Today, samdonne posted The Kids Aren't All Right, which on the surface is a multi-media Iron Man project that takes the form of a Vanity Fair article. When you look deeper, however, you can see the layers of time and effort and energy and sheer learning that such a piece takes and it's really and truly mind-blowing.

I cannot recommend this... experience enough. I don't care if you don't read Iron Man fic. I don't even care if you've never even seen the film (INFIDEL!). This will transcend all of that. Read it. You can thank me later.

July 3rd was serialkarma's birthday.

She said write me a story about this image. I said, WTF? And then there was crack. Love the crack.

Iron Man
Pepper, Tony, Jarvis, Happy, Rhodey
Rated PG


Snips & Snails & Puppy Dog Tails


( She's told him about playing with the other superheroes. )

Yesterday I wrote about Pepper in Three Men a Lady (and her Boss), today it's Jarvis' turn. For serialkarma (even though I made her beta it).

Iron Man
Tony, Jarvis, Pepper
Rated PG-13
Being of Sound Mind & No Body


( Are you saying that a bad orgasm is justifiable homicide? )